| Questions | Answers |
|---|---|
| Have you ever spotted a black jack "crew"? Or seen a "crew" taken out by the casino? | I've seen people TRYING to be a "crew." Most people who think they can count cards, can't. Right after that movie 21 came out the casinos were flush with confused college kids whispering to each other, "What's the count again?" |
| What's it cost to get a hooker to do anal? | Honestly, I have no idea. You can e-mail the prostitutes in Pahrump before going in and they would tell you if they offer the service and how much it would cost. |
| Also, great username. | |
| Do you have blackjack basic strategy down by heart? if so, and I just want to play that way, will you tell me what to do? are you allowed to tell me what to do if I just ask? Related question: do you keep a count of the cards yourself? if so are you good at predicting when a counter is going to make their big bets? | Yes, I have basic strategy memorized and some dealers are allowed to assist players, it depends on the casino. I only keep count if I'm bored or I suspect someone else on the table is counting. |
| My brother-in-law, Bob, was in Las Vegas last week. What did you think of him? | Bob was a delight for everyone and a generous tipper. We'd love to have him back again. |
| If I were to make a trip to Vegas, how would enabling the Wild Wasteland perk affect my travels? I've heard some people say it's what the experience should be in the first place and others say it's just stupid. | Enabling Wild Waseland turns the Wild Wild West Casino into a casino based on the Wild Wild West movie adaptation starring Will Smith; I don't recommend it. Plus the walls get all clippy. |
| What is the deal with counting cards? Is it easy to spot? If so, do you get a lot of amateur card counters trying to do this or cheat in other ways, and what is the normal course of action? Thanks! | Very few people actually try to cheat here. Spotting card counters is all in the way that they bet. It's a certain formula with very few methods of deviation so if they don't follow it strictly it doesn't work so nobody is worried about the amateurs. If a dealer suspects someone of card counting, they report it to their pit boss who then watches the game. If the person IS thought to be card counting they are simply denied service at the casino. |
| What happens if you drop a chip on the ground while dealing blackjack or roulette or some other game? Would you bend down to pick it up or is the risk that someone would take the chips on the table too great? | If a chip is dropped I'll call the floor supervisor over to retrieve it. Yes, the reason is to protect the chip rack. |
| If you were desperate for money, and you had to find a way to take, say, $250,000 out of a casino, what would your plan be? Is there anything you think you could actually get away with? | There's too many security guards, surveillance, and key cards to take it in cash. It's not Ocean's 11 security but they know what they're doing. The only other option would be to steal chips but the large denomination ones are RFID tracked so that would be a bust as well. I'd have a better success rate applying for a loan at the bank. |
| You ever run into any damned NCR? | No, this particular stretch of wasteland is ruled by Caesar. |
| What's your favorite game to deal? | Blackjack is my personal favorite. There's a bit of an art to it that I enjoy. We ARE allowed to cut someone off but it's still a little frowned upon. |
| Are you allowed to cut someone off if they obviously have a problem stopping when they should, like a bartender cutting off a lush? | We can also cut people off from drinking, like bartenders. |
| Can you explain a little more? Is it just that it's hard to tell a guy who's just lost a lot of money from a guy that has just mortgaged his house a third time? | The 3rd mortgage story is actually pretty rare. Most gamblers are actually quite good with money. But there are signs we look for to spot problem gambling patterns and direct them to appropriate help. |
| What other games do you deal? I'm a former croupier. I deal all the games. I used to get high limit black Jack a lot, because I was young, cute and pleasant. That meant more tips and less marks. However, I always had more fun in low level games. I'd take $5 black Jack over hand held baccarat any day. Thoughts? | I deal all of them as well, although I'll admit craps is not my forte. I'm always impressed with the ones who do it well. I prefer low-level stakes myself. Baccarat's a hellishy boring game to deal. |
| What are the signs you look for? | Multiple trips to the ATM is one. Suddenly gambling much larger amounts of money is another. Referred to as going "on tilt." |
| So full tilt would mean gambling large sums? If so, TIL. | It's a term more commonly used in poker but yeah, that's what it means. |
| What's the most you have seen someone win in one hand/night? | The biggest I've seen in one hand was a bad beat jackpot dealt in the poker room. The winner left with a little over 250,000 dollars. |
| What's the etiquette when you make a mistake? I was in Vegas recently playing poker and someone innocently took an extra dollar back from the pot, so the dealer didn't return my small blind. I told him, he said the pot was right, I said I put $6 in and it was $5 total to call, he said I took $1 back, I said I didn't, we go back and forth, he makes some personal remark about my being bad at math and how could the pot be right, I make some personal remark about it not being my job to police the pot and him being bad at his job. Eventually he offered to call the floor but the guy who took the extra dollar gives it to me so no floor is called. What's the correct way to handle this type of situation? | If you think a dealer has made a mistake you are correct in telling him immediately. The floor should be called if the situation isn't immediately solved. If the money in question is a small amount (say a dollar or two) then the house usually neutralizes the dispute by putting in the missing money. Larger amounts would go through surveillance though. |
| Vegas is a magic place to me. I love it so much and I'm planning on moving their in my late twenties or thirties, can you tell me what it's like to live in Vegas instead of just visit? Also, how did you get the job of a card dealer? | Locals actually have quite a few perks. Some strip clubs, dance clubs, shows, and etc. have a locals discount or "industry night." The Vegas lifestyle is available to the locals at a cheaper rate but just remember not to do it every day. To get a job as a dealer I filled out an application, passed an audition. Simple as that. |
| What's the residential part of Vegas like? I've only ever seen the popular areas, Fremont and the Strip, or the deserts. And as far as the heat, I live in west texas and I love working in the dry heat. | It's mostly apartment buildings and gated communities alternated by strip malls and bars. The best bars are off the strip, in my opinion. |
| When were you hired? What games did you have going in on your resume, what did you audition for? | I was hired for my current job in late 2010. I had all standard table games on my resume and I was auditioning for poker. Resume's aren't as important in dealing as the audition. If you've been dealing for 30 years and you mess up during the audition, they're going to go with the guy with only 1 year of experience who aced it. |
| What is the largest tip you have received at the table? Is it possible to pick up a casino employee or is that frowned upon? | The largest tip I've received was 600 dollars. I saw a player toss a cranberry (5k) chip to a dealer once. Tips are a big "X" factor for your income and if you're not working at a casino full time it can be difficult to budget. |
| I'm sorry, I completely missed your second question. Picking up a casino employee is possible and not really frowned upon. Don't expect much from the girls dealing in the "party pits" though. | |
| Can roulette dealers really drop the ball within a number or two? Do you work at a newer casino or an old one? I miss the sports book at the Frontier. How long have you been at this? | No, roulette dealers cannot do that. Roulette wheels are checked for bias electronically and any suspicious patterns would attract attention. I've work/ed at newer casinos and older ones. I prefer the character of the older houses but I think the Aria is amazing. I've been dealing for about 10 years now. |
| I was playing blackjack at the Hard Rock a few years ago when a couple of prostitutes joined the table for awhile, trying to strike it up with my brother and me. They eventually gave up and left. The dealer told us he referred to these girls as "rack rats" because when they are successful, it hurt the house take (chips accumulating in his rack). Is that a general term, or just this dealer's lingo? | I've personally never heard it but I wouldn't be surprised if it was a common term. Gaming slang is a lot of rhyming and alliteration. I'd much appreciate it if the whole world would please stop saying "Winner, winner Chicken Dinner." |
| I'm going to Vegas in a couple of months and I love magic. What are some of the best magic shows to go to and how far in advance should I buy tickets? | By far the best magic show, in my opinion, is Mac King's show at Harrah's. Simple, but amazing illusions in an intimate-sized theatre and very funny. Penn & Teller are great as well. The tickets can be picked up for a discount at ticket booths around the strip the day of the show. The kiosks are called Same-Day Tickets or Half-Price Tickets and are a good value. Stay away from the Criss Angel show. It's terrible. |
| Why is Criss Angel terrible, in your opinion? | He spends most of the show posing instead of doing magic tricks. I don't think Criss Angel is terrible, just his Vegas show. |
| Have you ever met a pornstar with hugely enhanced breasts? Like Kayla Kleevage, Minka, or Claudia Marie? | No, but I have met a few pornstars out here. They're generally nice people, although it's always been in relaxed social situations. |
| How... 'relaxed'? | At bars or private/home games. I've never met any at events like the AVN awards. |
| I have 200 Dollars for the night. What things to do will last the longest / provide me with the biggest value / return (average-common sense) - sights,places,activities ? | Depends, are you gambling at all? |
| Yes, Blackjack ? And Roulette maybe ? But I was thinking in the lines of sites / clubs... | If you're going to play low-limit table games you're probably going to want to go downtown to Fremont Street. Set aside about 40 dollars apiece and play the minimum that the table allows. If you want to see a show there are kiosks around the strip and in many casinos that offer discounted tickets for shows on the current day. Clubs are expensive to get into (30 dollars is about average) and the drinks are quite expensive as well (10 dollar beers and god help you if you order anything remotely fancy). |
| If I won 1 million dollars at the casino would the casino report that to the IRS? | Yes, you'd have to sign a tax form similar to a W-2 to receive the money. Depending on how much you'd gambled in the past year you'd have to pay about 30 percent of it to taxes. |
| The correct form is a W-2G, where they should automatically mail/give you at the end of the year. It tells you all sorts of other fun details as well, such as what kind of wagebet you made, among other details. | That's the one. Taxes isn't really my end of the gaming machine. |
| What's the biggest sucker thing you can do in vegas? I've heard that slot machines are actually terrible odds but people play them anyway... so what are the stupidest ways you can lose your money? | Gambling is generally the quickest way, and slots are the worst but I think some of them are pretty cool. I'm someone who likes flashing lights and noise. Many new penny slot machines have been arriving with preset minimum bets like 25 credits but they pay out odd amounts. This usually leads to a player leaving 19 cents or so on the machine and walking away. There's people who just spend all day wandering from casino to casino looking for unclaimed spare change on the machines. It can be lucrative. |
| Im going to vegas soon with my girlfriend. Im only going to be there 2 nights and a day and a half. What is something romantic or exciting that most tourists dont know about? | The hiking in Red Rock Canyon is great although you'd need a car. First Fridays down in the arts district is always fun. There are countless shows (stand-up comedy, theatre, etc.) off the strip. If you're unsure of what to do in a particular stretch of time and need ideas pick up a Las Vegas Weekly. They're available for free all throughout town. |
| Is this a local law, or something? Or does it have something to do with cost? | I don't know but I suspect it's cost-related. Most table games have a 5 dollar minimum bet with a dealer to keep action moving. An undercover cop on the slots could control the pace. I think it's a waste of money either way. |
| Um..why wouldn't the casino cooperate and just give them house chips to bet with and then give them back? Also can you please tell me a good book to learn basic blackjack strategy (I don't like to always sit in front of a computer) | No, the possibility of fraud is far too high to give away money. There really isn't such a thing as "house chips." There are non-denominational chips that are used in roulette as well as specialty chips used for tournament-style play but use of those would blow the cop's cover, obviously. Also, as long as the hookers aren't pestering every player they come across, the casinos don't really mind them so much. They'll need a bed eventually. To learn blackjack strategy (or really any casino game) I'd actually recommend sitting in front of the computer a wee bit longer and visiting wizardofodds.com. It's a great resource for gambling smart. |
| What's the most interesting thing that you've ever seen? | That's a big question. It's all VERY interesting. You'll have to be a little more specific. |
| Has anyone ever made a scene over losing a large amount of money? | As a dealer, you develop quite thick skin. People will call you names and curse a lot but very few actually cause much of a scene. If a scene is caused, security is usually called and they usually eject them. |
| I am going in a couple days with some friends. However, I don't know how to play any of the table games. Do you know any good sites/videos to learn games like poker for a beginner like me? | Actually, many of the major casinos offer free classes that teach you how to play, usually in the mornings from 9-11 am. Many casino games can seem confusing or intimidating. My advice would be to take the free lesson and, if it seems fun, don't be afraid to throw a few bucks on the real thing. Just don't spend all your time in the casinos. |
| What's the etiquette for requesting tips? I had a lucky night at the blackjack table and the dealer was being an asshole telling me my "generosity has been outstanding" is it harder work for me to win? fuck that guy. amiright? | You are right. Tips are voluntary and even if we suggest it, we do it in a way that makes you think it's your idea. Some dealers have no tact and that's sad. |
| Is it not considered rude to ask a guest to tip though? | Yeah, it is but some still resort to it since many people don't know. Most guests that aren't accustomed to tipping will tip after realizing it's the social norm ("when in Rome") but if coerced into tipping will not be likely to later. |
| Are tips pooled? Do you rotate tables? I imagine the tables with larger bets get bigger tips. | Tips are earned on a table-to-table basis when you deal cash games in poker. Table games (everything else requiring a dealer) generally pool tips and divide them equally on a 24-hour timeframe. All dealers rotate into all games (except for Poker, which is usually a completely separate department) at one point or another. Unless there's a generous high roller most of our money comes from the more numerous, smaller tips from low-limit games. |
| How does it work with high rollers? Do they carry the cash they bet with? For example, if someone's playing a $500 minimum bet table, I would assume they'd buy in for 10 to 20 bets worth of chips. Do they really just throw 5-10 grand down on the table? And then you call out "Changing ten thousand" and proceed to show every bill to the camera, turn it over, lay it down (and probably cover the entire table 2-3 times over) and then stuff all 100 $100-bills into the cash box? Or do they establish some sort of credit with the casino and just get chips based on that? | They usually get a line of credit for the higher stakes players, yes but you'll occasionally get the high roller that throws up a few grand on the table in cash. I've seen more than a few people carrying 10k bundles around. There's a guy who plays poker down on Fremont Street called The Duke of Fremont Street (you don't say?!) who carries around a violin case full of cash, gold, and gold money clips stuffed with cash. Some people just like the attention. |
| Besides the line of credit they often have deposits at the cage where they get their chips or wired it in before they plan to enter a casino. Correct me if I'm wrong, MrVegas. | You speak the truth. |
| Do you like Fallout? | Sure do. Big fan of the games. The map of New Vegas is somewhat accurate although not to scale, obviously. |
| What is considered a decent tip at a table? Took a reasonable amount of money from the Cosmo a few months ago. I'm a cheap ass who didn't intend to gamble much and finished my trip playing $25 per hand blackjack. If you were my dealer, I hope my tip was appropriate. | Most poker dealers will get a dollar a hand as a tip. Since poker isn't a house game that tip isn't necessarily a "thanks for the lucky hand" but more of a "thanks for moderating the poker game." If you're playing 25 dollars a hand and you are dealt a blackjack, the blackjack will pay 37.50. A common tip on that would usually be the 2.50 but we appreciate a dollar tip/bet. Anything over 5 dollars (that isn't a high-stakes game) would be considered generous. |
| Fuck you let's not talk vegas. So tell me. What do you think of ohio? | I've never been there. The astronauts seem to hate it though. |
| What did you think of Nick Papageorgio? | That guy from Yuma who works in software? Nice guy. My friend fitted him for a suit once. Although I heard he stole some tourist wallet once. |
| Have you ever seen a person or group of people successfully count cards and leave with a profit? Or are they all losers? | I've seen it done to varying degrees of success, it's just not very common anymore, at least in Las Vegas. Most card counting groups operate in smaller Indian Casinos where the dealers are less likely to be trained against it. Opening a brand new casino in an area new to gaming is like ringing the dinner bell for card counters. |
| Do you have herpes? | No. Condoms are widely available in Las Vegas and encouraged. |
| Is a royal flush really that rare? | The odds of a video poker machine dealing you a royal flush on the deal is a little under 650,000 to 1 (happened to me once). As a poker dealer, I've dealt four in 10 years, although I've run into dealers who've gone their whole careers without dealing one. |
| You mentioned that you have been a dealer for 10 years. Do you see yourself doing this until you can retire or do you see yourself moving up? If you want to move up, what do you want to do eventually? | I could easily see myself doing this for awhile. It's fun, easy money and casinos are the best places in the world to people watch. If I moved up I'd probably like to teach dealers. I view dealing as somewhat of an art form and I'd like to reteach the "right" way. |
| Is card dealing a specialty? In other words, have you never worked craps or roulette? I'm always amazed at how craps dealers can keep track of everything at a busy table. | Pretty much everyone is called a dealer whether they actually "deal" anything or not. I have worked craps and roulette as well. I'm kind of bad at craps, I'm sorry to admit but roulette's fun. |
| What's the deal with the garish, ugly carpets you see in casinos? | I think many of them are just trying to unique. When you line them up right next to each other one mega casino is pretty identical to the next so they have to out-gimmick each other in every way. Also, many casino's carpet is actually coded to indicate areas where minor are and aren't allowed. There's usually a yellow brick road of sorts to registration and elevators. |
| Ok, if you see someone thrusting hard, what do you do? | I hope what they're thrusting into is enjoying the attention and I leave them to their business. I'm not sure what you were asking here... |
| Are there any films that have accurately portrayed what your business is like? | Not really, in my opinion. I honestly think it could be a decent (can't believe I'm saying this) reality show but the corporations that own the casinos would never let us speak frankly. |
| What kind of cards do you use, bicycle?, a deck specific to the casino?, or something completely different? | Most casinos use Kem or Copag cards for poker. Anyone who plays cards at home should pick some of these up. They're pretty difficult to mark, bend resistant, and they're perfect for parties. You can wash them in the sink! Blackjack and other card-based table games generally use custom cards made for the casino. I've never really paid attention to what brand they are since they're changed out so often. |
| My wife & I are going in a few months. (4 days/3 nights). I plan on playing/losing ~$100 on roulette and avoiding the card games. We are mostly going for shows (I'll check out those booths you mentioned) & food. One of the days I plan to send her to a spa and I want to check out some sport related gambling. Where is the best place for sports betting? Is there live betting (quick bets as in : Will Verlander strike the next batter out?) | I've always thought the LVH (the old Hilton) has a really nice sports book and their odds have always been fair. The kind of live betting you're looking for is usually the kind of action you'll get from the other patrons in the sports book. The casino doesn't have time to set odds on that short of notice. |
| What's the deal with craps? I went on a cruise and they had a video on casino games on a continuous loop and i'd watch the craps session over and over and still not get it. i also went on a little mine-class in the casino, was still drawing blanks. is there a "Explain to me like i'm 5" with craps. | Craps is confusing because the objective of the game changes so frequently and the odds are somewhat strange. Unless you want to go in-depth with game strategy I'd suggest putting your money on the pass line and throwing the dice until they tell you to stop. Not the best advice, I know, but I'm not a huge fan of craps. |
| I'll be in Vegas this June, what are the best night clubs? Is it best to buy tickets for the clubs and shows before hand or just go with the flow once I'm there? | It's a little pricey to get in (40 dollars last time I was there, if memory serves me correctly) but the Moon nightclub at the Palms Hotel is pretty damn cool. Open air at the top of the building. I'd buy the club tickets in advance since they're usually the same price. Half-price ticket booth the day of the show you want to see. |
| What is the best local restaurant in Vegas? Like, residential area restaurant. | The Asian food out here is great. The Chinatown District on Spring Mountain is packed with awesome food. Just pick one. |
| I am going to Vegas for my first time in a couple of weeks. Any tips, advice, where is the most fun to be had for the lowest price? Thanks for doing this AMA! | There are lots of groupons available for Las Vegas. The pinball museum is a cheap way to burn an afternoon. |
| Also -is there a proper etiquette when playing with other people (eg Don't hit when a dealer has a bust card), or is it every man for himself? | Proper etiquette is to shore up your hand against the dealer's without harming the other players. Hitting when the dealer is showing a bust card has started more than a few fights that I've seen. Practice basic strategy and try to make sure you're playing with people who do the same. |
| Swingers club? | The two popular swingers' clubs are The Green Door and The Red Rooster. Ladies get in free (of course), single men pay a pretty high cover charge, and couples get in for half price. They're... interesting places to meet people. |
| If someone is counting cards but is also a generous tipper, do you let him get away with it a little longer? | Tipping is one way of diverting attention and, yes, it does work. However, as I stated elsewhere, card counters have to adhere to certain rules and formulas regarding their wagers. They've made blackjack a business and tipping is bad for business. |
| What are some tips to get casino comps? Also what is your favorite buffet in Vegas? (We go to Vegas for the food and right now our Favorite is the Bellagio) | Ask for them. The biggest thing is shyness. There's a lot of people gambling in a casino at any given time so if you want your play to be evaluated for comps, simply tell the dealer or floor manager. I don't eat at the buffets too often. |
| Do you prefer I give you straight tip or put your tip down as a wager? | Alternating them isn't a bad way to go. Or you can always ask the dealer. |
| What's the strangest thing you've ever seen while dealing? | Wilford Brimley calling me a cocksucker. |
| How much do you make per year? | It varies, of course. It averages out to around 38-46k. I'm not a rich man but I enjoy the hell out of life. |
| Is it worth doing a hooker? | That's up to you man. I know people who've had bad experiences with them and I've had people who've had great experiences. Not all hookers are diseased and misguided. Some are business-minded and know that they're offering a service and do so professionally. |
| What do you think about older smaller casinos. Have you been to the tropicana lately? | I enjoy a lot of the smaller places. The Clarion is a great locals hangout and so is the Greek Isles. I was at the Trop yesterday. They recently remodeled almost the whole place. Looks great. |
| I heard the casinos make applicants take a hair test before getting hired...is this true? | Yes, you need to pass a drug test (usually hair) to get hired at nearly all casinos. It's only the one unless you do a union job though. |
| So when it comes to poker, "tight is right"? | I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. Could you elaborate? |
| Thank you for counting my cards when I'm a little slow. | You're welcome. You're there to have fun, not to do simple math all day. |
| I hear there are hookers in Vegas. How much would it cost for the hooker and I to get naked, except for sailor hats. Then we get into a Jacuzzi filled with Pepto-Bismol, and I clip her toenails while she shaves my buttocks. | 3000 dollars. |
| Prostitution is illegal here in Clark County. Just felt like pointing that out. | I couldn't resist the Rat Race reference. Yes, prostitution is illegal, BUT you can drive about 45 minutes west to Pahrump and get a legal hooker at a brothel. |
| Dont a question for you, but this was the best AMA I've read in months! Funny answers, and detailed answers for the serious questions. | Thanks. This is pretty fun, I've got to say. This is my first AMA and I genuinely like informing and entertaining people. It's probably why I love my job. |
| Yes, I'm referring to the playing style. Either you place "loose" and play a lot of hands. Or you play "tight" and play far less hands, the best hands. | Poker strategy is slippery and no one credo or saying is right. If you're a beginner it's best to play a little more conservatively but you'll need to able to change gears eventually. |
| Unless he was controlling a single deck with both hands, never. | Right answer. |
| 10% Generous/Grateful 5% A welcome but standard tip 1% Depending on your attitude towards me, may have been an insult, or just a cheapo. | Never feel like a tip is an insult. I make nearly my entire living by people tipping me one dollar at a time. "Cheapos" pay my bills. |
| I've personally never heard it but I wouldn't be surprised if it was a common term. Gaming slang is a lot of rhyming and alliteration. I'd much appreciate it if the whole world would please stop saying "Winner, winner Chicken Dinner." | Also, the savvy prostitutes will only pick up guys from table games. Vice cops can play slots undercover to try to lure in hookers but can't play table games. |
| Questions | Answers |
|---|---|
| Who was your inspiration for RC? When you did Team America, did they tell you what kind of voice they wanted for I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. or did you just choose the one you thought would be funniest? (You choose correctly). Besides you, who is the greatest radio show host of all time? | That's a really good question. The voice came to me in 1987 actually, as part of a character inspiration I had that had to do with a really young, really dumb, yet really arrogant kid-- the kind of kid that I grew up around. The kind of kid who sounded like they were four years old, but thought they were the shit and had answers for everybody. The first name that RC ever had was "Cleve", and then in Miami years later, I was fooling around with a Rocky the Squirrel voice and I decided to marry the Cleve attitude with the Rocky the Squirrel voice. |
| Hi, Phil. How did you learn to do all those awesome characters and maintain a back-and-forth between the character on the phone and yourself as the host? It's g. d. hilarious. | It's instinctive. It's nothing you can really learn. I listen to people throughout my life and I learn to mimic them, and I've always been fascinated with the ebb and flow of human dialogue. I listen very carefully, and I want to marry the world of real speech with humor. That is to say, make the humor sound as naturally occurring as possible. |
| What ultimately lead to you leaving KFI and concentrating more on TRN? Was it a money choice? | Regarding KFI: My contract was up at ClearChannel, and I had decided to focus on acting at the time. When I listened to what was on the radio over the next year, I realized that there was still a great opportunity on late nights, in my opinion at that time, to exploit a whole new audience in news talk. So I took the opportunity to contact TRN, since my manager was tight with them at the time, and proposed a late night talk show. |
| Several years ago you did a segment called "The Death of Dylan", where Bobbie Dooley basically just mourned the death of her son for an hour. I've always wondered...what was the origin of this segment? Did you know going in that it would remain entirely dramatic? Was it a prank on the audience, who were waiting for the joke to come? | Yes, I knew it would remain dramatic. It was completely out of character for the show, but at that time I think I was looking for something different to do on the radio show. I was trying to shake it out of a doldrums I had felt it had fallen into, and so I took it the only way I could take it, which was dramatic, and that was the result. |
| Hiya Phil. Have you been doing much live work these days — stand ups etc.? If so, how about bringing it down to your desperate fans in South Florida? Please! | Yes, I'd love to bring it to South Florida. I'm scheduled to do my second one-man show in early June in Los Angeles. As that goes, so goes the rest of the country... but Miami is definitely on the schedule. |
| Who is the most annoying actor you've ever worked with? as an actor, where do you get your health insurance from? who is the most beautiful woman you've ever worked with? what's your favorite show on television right now? what's the best movie you've seen lately? | Most annoying actor? I worked with an actor who was the star of the show I was on, and he continually showed up morning after morning without knowing his lines. And this is hearsay, but apparently he mistreated one of the other actors. It was frustrating, because the rest of the cast was very hardworking. |
| I have a couple questions for you. First off, do you have any idea in your head of how RC Collins would be as an adult? I really loved his transformation from goth to military academy student, and I’d really be interested to know how he turns out as a 25-30 year old. | RC would probably be working in his father's business, autocratic, successful. |
| Also, after I heard how people got the hell out of the way when they saw Ted Bell coming (due to his personalized license plate) I got his name on my license plate (please dont sue me). I have had no success. Now, as a woman the only person who may mistake me for Mr. Bell would be Frank Gray. Do you think my lack of success is more due to that or because I just drive a lowly chevy sonic. Would it work better if I drove something European? | I think it's pretty strange that as a woman you got a license plate that says "Ted Bell". I'm still getting over that one. |
| Lastly, what do you order at waffle house? | I've never been to a Waffle House in my life, even when I lived in the South for some six years. |
| Did listener feedback from your BSPs have anything to do with your decision to not bring back Nikki McKee? I thought her presence was a great addition to the show, maybe even just once a week or so, however it seemed like your BSPs didn't feel the same way. Having turned down George Carlin for a guest role in the past, what made you try out Ms. McKee? | Not at all. That was entirely organic to our show, in consult with people who work with me. In fairness to Nikki, I have to say that some pretty big names have from time to time wanted to perform on the show with me; people that I really love and admire. And I've had to say "no" to them too. It appears that this radio show is best done as a solo act all the way. |
| Hi Phil! Been listening to your show on terrestrial for a couple of years and followed you to the podcast. Love the new format. Wanted to know if there are anymore plans for the One Man Show? Maybe for us in here Seattle? Cause we always get ignored. ;) | Yeah, the same answer about this as before. The one-man show is starting up this summer, and Seattle will be on the itinerary. I love Seattle; even though I hate the Seahawks (except for Richard Sherman). |
| Phil, a looong time ago, you had a bit where an old lady was trying to get on the show, and she didn't hang up her phone, and you listened to the whole conversation that was going on in the background. They were watching all these funny shows like Kids Say the Darndest Things and Billy Graham. Was that real??? I always wondered if that caller ever found out she was on your show for a half hour and didn't even realize it? | I think I remember that call, and yes it was very real. It spawned quite a number of bits we did later on, of people not being able to hang up phones. It's very interesting in the time since that bit we have almost completely abandoned the cradle-style phone, that is the phone that's "hard to hang up". A cell phone is not hard to hang up. |
| What is your favorite cartoon? (yours don't count) | Of the old school stuff, Warner Brother's Looney Tunes, by far. Of the new school stuff, probably King of the Hill. |
| Hi Phil, What's your opinion of the radio industry in the US? Do you think it's here to stay for a while? Or do you see a downhill trend? HUGE fan of your show. Used to listen as often as I could back in the days of KFI. | I think radio is going to morph further and further away from the AM/FM delivery platform and trend closer and closer to a web-based delivery, because when you say radio you're simply talking about a delivery system. You're talking about a delivery platform. And I don't know that the delivery platform is as important as the content. As it is right now, radio content is dogshit, and web content is winning. That seems to be where the real creativity is. |
| What is the best advice ever given to you? | The best advice I've ever received was to be authentic. Authentic is a better word than real. So I have to be the authentic Phil Hendrie, just as we all have to be the authentic version of whoever we are. |
| What do you think of Bill Handel? | I think Bill's success is in the rather self-effacing manner that he presents himself. He lets us in on the fact that he really doesn't believe he knows everything, and that some mornings he's just sort of lost. And that's endearing. It's a good success story. |
| Did you ever call into Art Bell or George Noory to prank them? You imitating Art Bell and Ross Mitchel was hilarious. | And no, I don't call to crank anyone's show. |
| Hey Phil, Is Justin Roiland insane and scary as his IMDB photo? And also has it been a ton of fun to work on the show Rick and Morty? Link to ia.media-imdb.com. | No, Justin's a hard-workin son of a bitch. Constantly working, as a matter of fact. A really good professional friend. He's been a great resource for us as we develop our animation idea. You know, Justin's the guy who really got that project moving. |
| Is "radio host Phil Hendrie" another character you do, or is your radio personality a pretty true representation of yourself? | "Radio host Phil Hendrie" is a radio character, and by that I mean, he's real... but he's on the radio. So let's put it this way. The person you present to your grandmother is real, but it's your grandmother's self. And the same can be said in any situation we're in. Hence it is in radio. |
| Hi, Phil. I'm a long time fan who used to listen to you back when you were on WIOD. I really miss those day now because radio sucks down here. I know he was a cranky bastard sometimes but do you have any good memories of Neil Rogers? Any funny off mic moments? | Every memory I have of Neil is a good memory. Listening to him on the radio was never anything other than a lot of fun. He was my mentor, he was a great artist, the radio industry still doesn't understand how brilliant he was, he buried people like Rush Limbaugh in the ratings year after year... Norm Kent said of Neil, "he had an inherent understanding that people are not motivated by a higher calling, but by when the cable guy is gonna show up to fix their fucking TV." That's why Neil was great. |
| Phil, you are a personal hero of mine. Thanks for doing what you do. What do you think it is about people that makes them call in and argue with these ridiculous characters? | Well, when they used to call in and argue, it was because they had very strong feelings about the topic that we were discussing. I think anybody who is motivated emotionally by any particular issue is vulnerable to doing something like that. I think we may forget ourselves sometimes. You know, I listen to my show and I know that it's me doing the voices of these different characters, but as I hear them, they're very real. They are different people. And I'm lost in the theater of it. |
| How did you come to participate on Rick and Morty? Is there anything special on the process of dubbing this series? | I was called by the producers of the show and they wanted me to come in and read for a couple of characters. They were producing the pilot back in the summer of 2011, if I'm not mistaken. And so I was happy to go in and read for them. |
| If you're talking about anything special in voicing characters for this series, then no. Nothing out of the ordinary. | |
| Do you ever "miss" your characters when you're not performing? | How can you miss them when they're always with you? One way or another, they haunt me, waking and sleeping. |
| Phil, I have loved your show for years...pure genius. I have also listened to your new podcast shows and was wondering if you are never taking calls from unsuspecting listeners again? Seems impossible with the new format. | It's impossible with any format, because the angst that drove talk radio callers in the past has been re-directed into social media. Facebook, Twitter, et all now provide the outlet for that passion. And you don't have to go through some smart ass talk host to say what you want to say. |
| Pre-9/11, pretty much every hour of the show was character-driven. Afterwards, you started doing an hour or so every show as yourself, talking about current events. How do you feel this changed the course of the show/the makeup of your audience? Were you headed in this direction, anyway? | I think it hurt the show, ultimately, doing serious talk about those events. I think it split the audience down the middle and confused them. We all have opinions about things that happen in the world, and some of those opinions you just keep to yourself or express them to friends and family. When you're a guy that engages in comedic entertainment like me, you don't bring that shit to the show. And I think that really hurt our show... BUT there were far more things that hurt it much worse, and that is the radio industry itself totally unprepared to support a show like mine. |
| Hey Phil, I wanted to thank you for several golden years of my youth spent thinking you were actually arguing with the craziest people. Learning the truth only made it better. I love your work, and you are an inspiration to me. Thank you. I guess if I could ask anything, what is the craziest reaction youve gotten from someone while on the radio? | Probably the Greenskeeper bit from over a decade ago. A man who works at Cheviot Hills golf course, here in the LA area. He almost had a stroke. You can find that clip on the "Best of 2000" CD. |
| Phil. Your pizza hut call as well as the old lady you had pressing #'s (both wrong # calls) were on a level above any other prank phone call recordings I've ever heard. I know that's not part of your show's regular content but have you ever considered doing more stuff with phones as far as placing calls in character? Your calls would be legendary. | In order to do that I have to first get the permission of the person that I'm calling, before I even roll tape. In the state of CA if you do not do that, you are guilty of a felony. So the idea of an unsuspecting caller who's being cranked, that is they're being called instead of calling me, is legally impossible. |
| Hey Phil, always been a big fan. To me the Greenskeeper is radio at its absolute finest. My question is, considering a huge part of your show was to get unsuspecting callers riled up, how important did you feel time slot played into your show? Does it feel like with your show in particular, time slot was more important than other radio shows? | I think our time slot ultimately really hurt our show in commercial radio. I think we should have been in an earlier day slot. But that's not the real point. The real point was that my show is talk show in name only; it doesn't fit on the same radio station with news talk shows like Beck or Hannity or Hartmann. It never has. It is a comedy show, and belongs with lots of other comedy shows, or in a morning drive slot. But I don't think even my show would have worked in morning drive on commercial radio. |
| Phil, has anyone ever sent you recordings of their attempts at doing your show? Are there any promising successors to your throne of character-based radio genius? | I don't know of any. I think anybody that is interested in bringing entertainment back to radio, no matter what the format, they've got my vote. They've got my support. It's not about copying one artist or another; it goes back to that word I used earlier: authentic. If you are a comic artist and you want to use radio as the medium, then you've got my support a million percent. Because radio's in big trouble. |
| Phil, if you could share a jar of Yucca with any three people throughout the history of time (living or dead, obviously), who would you dig up and where would you hold this gathering? | Abraham Lincoln, Leo Tolstoy, and Jack Kerouac. It would be at Bob Hope's old, mountain home above 111 in Palm Springs. And we wouldn't start drinking until 1 AM. |
| My question: how did 9/11 affect your show? It obviously changed radio for a while, but what about your show specifically? Follow up: do you have any topics you won't cover because you don't want to offend anyone? | No topics are off limits. |
| One more question, it seems like sometimes in the past, a character has said something that has genuinely surprised you. I know that the characters are also you and that you have an uncanny ability to create realistic conversations, but sometimes your reactions to the things you say as the characters seems to be genuine. Do you find that in some cases, the characters "become real" in a way, and seem to flow from you without much thought? | Do we surprise ourselves sometimes? The answer is yes. So, it's probably not unusual for me to ad lib or improvise something and have it surprise me a bit. But part of being an actor is creating a reality. And so I feel that, at least in your case, I have created that reality. And I'm proud of that. |
| Hey Phil, care to give any hints about the one man show? Will it feature your cast of characters? Stories from your radio career? Or something completely new? | It's the characters. It's me interacting with the characters, but obviously in a live setting. I want to bring to the stage as much of what I've developed on the radio show as possible, so it's not just me in character, it's me AND other characters. |
| Was the line "All you can eat negro" off the cuff? | It was an off the cuff line that was written on a white board by my engineetech at the time, Mike Crozier. |
| Do you still hate 'Three Dog Night'? | I don't know that I ever really hated them. I just that they were kinda bubble-gummy. Lately though, I've re-listened to songs like "Shambala" and "Family of Man" and like 'em. |
| Phil. I love eating at "Tommy Burger" in California. Do you enjoy eating at Tommy Burger? | Don't eat there. Can't tell you about it. |
| In N Out and Tops Charbroiled are the best burger stands in CA in my opinion. | |
| Phil, I started listening to your show on accident in the early 2000's on the Premier Radio network satellite feed when I set my receiver to the wrong channel. So i'm pretty much "Long time listener first time caller" here. I've laughed to the point of tears on several occasions every since. Not that it would make any difference, but I've always wondered--does this guy smoke pot? | Recently I've smoked some medical weed for sleep issues that I have, but I don't use it recreationally. |
| What did you have for lunch today, Phil? | I had six Morning Star Veggie hot dogs (50 cals each for a total of 300 calories). |
| Hi Phil, great show as always. A couple years ago, Howard Stern spoke highly of you and mentioned he even visited once to watch you do the show. I'm a huge Stern fan as well, but have always been bothered by his show ripping off a few of your bits in the mid-2000's. (One I remember specifically: Stern spending close to an hour talking to guy who claims he was digging up his father's yard and found a skull... exactly like you had Lloyd Bonnifide do). Did you ever mention to Stern his writers were ripping you off? | I've never known Howard to rip off any of my bits. You're talking about a guy who has created the modern sensibility in radio, the unrestricted, uncensored sensibility. If anybody's been ripped off over the years, it's Howard. |
| Phil, I absolutely love the show, you keep me in stitches the whole time. When I first started listening (2011) you were on radio and I didn't know the premise of the show. How many complaints do/did you get for your satirical approach? Keep up the great work! | I really at this point can't tell you how many complaints we get from listeners. It's not significant enough to warrant notice. I think most people recognize it for what it is: a satire. |
| Phil! For some reason, I didn't like when the General was added to the panel, but he quickly became one of my favorite characters. I've always wondered, who would be your favorite(s) of your characters? | Well, I have been asked that question before, and I usually answer it the following way because it actually applies: when you ask a parent who their favorite child is, it's an impossible question to answer. They can certainly tell you what they like about each child, or what may irritate them from time to time about each child, but there's no way you can single out any one as your favorite. |
| How brutal was RC Collins or Colleen Kristen Brewster to your voice? | Once you get that voice warmed up you can perform it for a long stretch. The brutality isn't in performing the voice; the brutality is in making sure that those two personalities are distinct enough that it comes out in the voice. It being just an audio medium, and not visual, you rely on your voice for a couple of extra levels of performance. You have to make Colleen Kristen Brewster come alive as not just dumb, but a dumb female. And RC Collins has to maintain his personality as the arrogant, young male. Even though both of those voices are very similar in the timbre and range, they have to be distinct personalities. That's the hard part. |
| Have Americans become too dependent on government? | Not at all. The question is: our society, being a freely interacting society, how can it avoid closer interaction with government? The government is a resource. It belongs to you and I the same way a public library does. Use it. Make it work for you. Don't fear it like it's some evil spirit or boogie man hiding under the bed. It's the most childish thing in the world to see the government as an evil entity out of Game of Thrones. |
| Do you ever get recognized by strangers in public? If so, how do you feel about it? Is it annoying or endearing? | I do. And I'm completely cool with it. People are always really nice. I like it. |
| When you create your characters, do you have a visual idea of what they might look like? or does that happen more organically as they mature? | It happens more as they mature. The attitude is the first thing that comes into relief, if you will. And that begins to fill out the physical look of the person. And then what they do for a living. And then gradually, that person's relationships come into focus. Are they married? Are they single? How many friends? Etc. And then comes where they live. But this is all part of an actor's process. You have to know more about a character than you're going to ever tell the audience. |
| Hey Phil, I really really really really love your show. How do you feel the callers have changed in the 20+ years you've been doing the show? | Callers are far more savvy to what they call "shock jocks"; they're far more aware of the fact that there is a high degree of entertaining going on, and not so much social consciousness and evaluation of issues. So they're a lot more on guard to that reality. |
| Hello... Do you think there is a spiritual side to humans? or is it all behavior? | There is a non-behavorial physical side to humans, and it is instinct and belief. The amount of time and energy you put into instinct and belief can create something perceived as spiritual. What it is, in point of fact, is a reality that we create. For instance, if you believe that something will happen, it will happen, depending upon the energy that you put into your instinct and belief. |
| Hey Phil, first off, you are literally the funniest man in the world. Literally. Personal question: Is there more money in AM radio than podcasts (or vice versa?) | There's far more money in digital these days than there is in radio. And that's why we're doing a digital based show. In fact, there's been far more money in digital in the last seven years than there's been in radio. At least for us. |
| How many of the colorful phrases you use on the show (e.g. "got them by the short and curlies") did you pick up from your time working construction? | There's a number of phrases that I've picked up from construction. I don't know if "short and curlies" is one of them, but... We used to say when I was finishing cement, "you gotta grab that trowel like you're beatin' your meat." |
| Thanks for all the laughs Phil! To this day I still think of some of the calls your characters put in (dating back to the 90's) and they still make me chuckle. How difficult is it not to laugh while performing? | It's not difficult, because you're in character, and while what that character says may be funny to a lot of people, it's not funny to the character himself. He is deadly serious about what he thinks, etc. |
| Is it mainly you who comes up with the characters/bits/storylines/etc? Obviously you do all the voice work and I'm guessing most of it is ad-libbed, but do you work with anyone else to come up with the crazy scenarios your characters are always in day after day? | I used to work with others, but I found that having a writer was a real handicap for me. It could very well be that I'm just a massive control freak, but I don't like to collaborate with people on this show. I tried it and it was always very frustrating for me. |
| Do you have any fond memories of your time in Atlanta other than the flight out? | Haha. I have very many fond memories of my time in Atlanta, and it has to do with the women of that fine city, whose names I will not reveal at this time. |
| Do you/have you ever used sound clips of the characters in order to have vocal overlap? (I think the way you use things like the rustling paper or just having the characters interject very quickly works really well in keeping the illusion going.) | Never. We don't pre-produce anything for our show really, other than basic production elements like sound effects. |
| Hey Phil, thanks for doing another one of these. I was wondering if you were ever tempted to actually feature Walter Bellhaven and provide a voice for him in a bit. If so, how do you imagine he would sound? And I'll hang up and listen, thank you. | Never. Walter's effective as one of those behind-the-scenes characters. He's far more effective that way, I think. |
| I'm not sure of the year ( I think it was around the same time you had the Art Bell skit where General Jameson gets killed trying to enter Area 51), but one Halloween you told the story of Henry Lee Lucas and Ottis Toole. It was a huge departure from the usual tone of your show, as it was very unsettling due to the amount of detail you gave in your telling of the story, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Was there any fallout from that episode other than the usual idiots thinking they were listening to the wrong show? | No. I think people actually enjoyed it... at least, as I remember. |
| Is there a time where you were able to get a caller to completely lose their shit more than usual? | See my other answer somewhere about the poor Greenskeeper. |
| How many times do you sneeze in a week? | No more than three. Depending upon what I eat... |
| Phil, this is sorta show related. You used to do all those Sopranos updates with RC Collins on your show. And they were soo funny by the way. Just wondering what you thought about the Sopranos ending? | I thought it was a great time to end it. I'm very much a fan of ending shows when they should be ended and beginning something new. Sopranos was a transcendent television show. It was phenomenal acting and writing, and something like that has to come to an end at some point. |
| Who are your favorite sporting teams? Football, Basketball, Soccer. | Basketball: The Lakers. |
| Football: 49ers. And that's heresy coming from a longtime Ram fan, but I'm not a St. Louis Ram fan, so whatever. | |
| Soccer: Everton from the Premiere league. | |
| Hockey: LA Kings. | |
| Baseball: The Dodgers. | |
| One of the funniest episodes I remember hearing was the remote broadcast from the auto parts store on Fifth and Flower, where you were on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to the owner's insistence on you reading his ad copy a certain way, and we could hear you when you "went to a commercial". I remember it ended with a costumer assaulting you on-air and Dickman standing around not helping. Any plans to do a "remote broadcast" with the new panel of Gen. Shaw, Margaret, Bud, and Robert? | Any "remote broadcasts" nowadays will be a version of my one-man show. That is the next step that I want to take in performing, and that's getting up on the stage in a theatrical setting and performing these characters. |
| Hey Phil, thanks for the time - you've always put out an entertaining show, but is there a particular segment that you're proud of as one that perfectly captured what your show is all about? | I think truly the show that I'm doing now is as close to the perfect Phil Hendrie show as any I've ever done. Narrowing it down to a segment would be difficult, if not impossible. |
| Do you wipe your butt with your left or right hand? | Right-hand. Always right-hand. I think we wipe with the dominant hand. If you're right-handed but you wipe with your left hand, you have some serious fucking issues. |
| Phil, have you ever been asked to do a voice on The Simpsons? | I have never been asked to do a voice on The Simpsons, but I would be proud as punch to be a part of that great show. We'll see what happens over the coming epoch. |
| I remember a bit from a while back where Art Griego was discussing taking accident photos of airplanes. My favorite line was Art saying that Abraham Zapruder was his "patron saint." At the end, Taylor gave you line that was apparently so inappropriate you had to get out of the bit. What was the line? | I don't recall that at all. I don't even know if Taylor was the engineer at the time. Could have been Mark Newman or Mike Crozier. |
| What kind of underwear to you wear, since you brought it up? | Boxers. |
| One more question - do you have a favorite / least favorite character to have on the show? | I don't really have a least favorite. |
| Quick question, what's your favorite James Bond movie? | The Daniel Craig "Casino Royale". |
| I know you had Larry King on once and fooled. | Yeah, I got Larry King pretty good once. I can't think of any others off the top of my head. |
| Hi Phil. First of all, I love your show. Your are so talented. You mentioned Mrs. Olson's on your show. I'd like to visit California and check it out. What is the best thing to get for breakfast | The tri-tip omelet with a side of their potatoes and corn tortillas. And a big glass of OJ. |
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