THE GAMBLER CHORDS (ver 2) by Kenny Rogers @ Ultimate ...

I strongly suggest you start at the beginning.
If you’re still lost/wish to know more; the NFC has provided extra information on the fighters in this tournament.
Where we left off: The only thing they fear is her.
-
I couldn’t help but feel the lingering sense of dread as I grabbed my Hawaiian shirt and took one final look down at the pit before leaving; the finalists walked off to the dugout with Nora flashing me a grin and pointing down towards the infirmary, Eustace muttering something under his breath as he caressed his satchel and Wendy staring at Alduin as she sauntered off with a cackle.
“They only thing the NFC fears now… is you.”
What the hell did he mean by that? Alduin, Malphas, himself and even Zunk were all feared competitors. Why would Wendy be the one to fear above all others?
Still, there were more pressing matters. I had to get to the infirmary and fast. Dodging the crowd of experts and would-be fighters wanting to give me a piece of their mind, I navigated through a large group of men before finding myself turning towards the darkened steps below, a dingy “infirmary” sign hanging and a shape lurking in the back I assumed was Nora as I walked towards her.
“h….k” they called out, the vocal chords raspy and weak, as if this was their first use in decades.
“Nora? I can’t hear you, what’re you trying to say?”
I stopped and peered, trying to figure out what was in front of me and instincts stopping me getting closer.
Looking back, that may have saved my life.
What stepped forward into the light and painfully close to me belonged in the deepest parts of this building or at the deft hands of only the most skilled combatant in that pit, not here.
“H…o…k” The sound became clearer, each consonant gurgled out in a guttural drone, his eyes wide and piercing amid a sea of white makeup and thick black eyeliner, a red sigil painted on both sides of his cheeks and joining down at the chin. He edged closer, gripping the sign tightly. “HONK IF YOU’RE HUNGRY” strewn across in a thick pungent putty that pulsated in place, nails digging into the cardboard. One started to peel away as it was forced further in, black rotting flesh poking out from underneath.
“Wh-what the fuck are you? Where’s Nora?” I asked, realising how futile and stupid I must have looked, asking this meat clown to explain itself when it could barely even speak.
Then, it let out a guttural screech as it dived for me, a piece of its jaw threatening to tear away from the face as it moved faster than its damaged body should allow.
“Hoooonkryyyy” It howled, the sound like a banshee rooting me to the ground in fear as this ravenous monstrosity made a beeline for me, rotted fingers and bared yellow teeth housed in mouldy gums ready to tear into me.
In that moment, it was as if time froze. From the time between its dive to me closing my eyes and opening them; there was a resounding thud and crunch, dust kicking up all around me when I ventured to look and realised I was somehow intact.
A woman stood in front of me, standing upright and sighing. An instrument strapped to her back that she shook the dust out of while grumbling. She was tall; her face covered in piercings and her lips smeared in black lipstick, her flowing brown hair nestled under a dark blue hoodie. The meat clown was now firmly stuck in the side wall, one of his eyes sealed shut from the kick he’d received and his long grey tongue hanging loosely out of his distended jaw. He didn’t move, and the sign now stood next to him like a makeshift tombstone.
“Man, you just attract them like a vulture to carrion, don’t you? I knew you were gonna be a headache, but who’d have thunk you’d do this much…” She put her hands on her hips and shook her head as she turned, tiredness wracking her face and smile lines evident from one too many times having to put on a brave face. She irradiated calmness and strength all at once. “Names Freyja, figured we’d be meeting soon. We’re close to the end, after all.”
She reached out a fist, and I bumped it, awkwardly.
“You mean the end of the tourney? You sure took your time, I think I already met some of your kind.” I frowned and felt uneasy, looking past her to the doorway. She retracted her fist and laughed, shaking her head.
“Not as cool as before, I see. No matter, we can walk and talk. Let’s go, you’re gonna try and save Nelle, right?” She opened the door, and I stopped before stepping past the threshold, hands firmly in my pockets as she eyed me up. “I’m not gonna stop you, y’know… but there’s gonna be consequences.”
After a moment of hesitation, I walked ahead and passed through the dimly lit hallway, trudging behind her as she spoke, flecks of the light illuminating her and showing a woman under strain; scars on her face from incessant acne that she’d inevitably once picked at, bags under her blue eyes, errant hairs that stuck to her face. When she caught me looking, she flashed a side grin and pushed them out of her face.
“Even someone like me isn’t perfect, y’know. Gotta embrace the bad with the good. Wouldn’t want any of my fans to have unrealistic expectations. Still, they’ll persist… much like you, they’re compelled to.” She paused as we reached the double doors, turned away from me. I figured it was now or never to try and connect the dots, especially if what I did next incurred some kind of penalty I couldn’t get away from.
“The music, does it have something to do with you?” I held up the iPod and the faint glow cast a long shadow along the back of the door. She turned and upon seeing it, her face sank for a moment as melancholy settled in.
“Yeah, my sisters know how to bring me to the party even when I don’t want to be brought. My job is to oversee actions and consequences. As the bard, music is my primary connector and since I’ll always be drawn to those moments and to… well, you. It was inevitable to be here. But something is different this time. They want to put an end to the cycle and can’t do so without my being here. They think they’re doing the only thing possible. I don’t share that sentiment, but we all can only influence at a distance. Anything more and we cause a bigger reaction down the line.”
She turned to me and stared at my pockets.
“If you use that silver tear now, it’s not a loss that will befall you later, but something far more insidious. You will come to know so much and yet be left with so little. It will change you in ways that even I don’t know yet.” She almost looked forlorn before that melancholy returned and her smile, though pained, lit up her face as she sighed. “But… you’ve already made up your mind, so why am I wasting my time?”
I gripped the potion in my pocket and swallowed, nodding.
“She’d do the same for me, if she could.” I croaked as I walked forward, Freyja pushing the door open and allowing in the cold, sterile light of the infirmary as her voice called out behind me.
“She already did.”
-
Nora was waiting, leaning over Nelle and carefully pushing her hair aside as she dusted off her outfit, meticulous in her efforts to make Nelle look as clean as possible.
“Y’know I didn’t really know her, but I had heard stories of the great Madame Nelle Lockwood… discoverer of the mud dwellers, destroyer of the bone spider scourge, hero of The Spaces In Between… she’s a legend here in Sturgeon for all that she’s done. Yet, I only got to see her in those fights.”
Nora shook her head, standing up and looking over at me. “I’m not an emotional kinda gal, but it’s never easy to see someone you admire just gone like that.”
Saying nothing, I walked over and stood by Nelle’s side, Nora backing off to give me some space. Pulling out the potion, I poured the contents into Nelle’s mouth and stood back, clutching the bottle in my hand.
The room was silent for the briefest of moments until it was broken by the extreme intake of air, pained cries and gasping by Nelle as her body thrashed, bent and finally sat upright. She clutched at her chest and with eyes watering, grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and pulled me close.
“You just can’t help yourself, can you?!” Her voice was low, pained and filled with the kinds of complex emotions that I knew weren’t meant for me. I didn’t know what to do, what to even say as her voice began to break. “Last time you made the choice without me. I watched you go, and I promised I’d never let it happen again. I wasn’t there the last time, and I vowed to be there this time, to make my own choice and help END this fucking mess… but I should’ve known better… I’m as bound to this as you are.” She looked over at the both of us, Nora wide-eyed and glancing at the bottle for a moment before returning her gaze to Nelle. She shook her head and smiled, offering out a hand to help her up.
“Glad you’re back in the land of the living, Nelle. It’s almost time, I’ll leave you guys to it, but wish me luck, kay?” She pulled me in for a hug that lasted just a little bit too long before smirking and dashing off up the stairs, leaving me to hoist Nelle under my shoulder and follow at a snail’s pace, obviously still weak from the proceedings.
“Did I ever tell you the story of the nun and the monk, Sal?” She asked, head still drooping on occasion as we cleared the hallway and made for the stairs, the sound of barking and enthusiastic gamblers filling the air as we ascended. I shook my head, and she continued. “There was always two opposing views, nobody is really sure how they started but there was always a disagreement and eventually a pact was made to go their separate ways. But the nun broke the pact and went to her priest for a way to do away with the monk for good. I don’t know what happened when they finally clashed, but the end result was two forces that would follow a pattern wherever they went; one who regrets… one who forgets.”
As she finished, we reached the top, and she got up from under my arm, stretching and sighing as she looked at me with that same stare wracked with decades of regret, sorrow and guilt.
“All this time and I never get used to it, not once.” She caressed my cheek with a hand and shuffled back to the booth, grabbing a bottle from her bag and drinking with vigour as I stood there, dumbfounded and knowing I was the most obscure piece in a much, much bigger puzzle.
Story of My Life, really.
-
After a quick refill on food and drink, allowing me to collect my thoughts, I took my seat in time for the lights to dim and Alduin to be already bathed in the bright light, her cape shimmering as the sleeves fluttered behind her gloriously in the makeshift breeze. She had a flair for the dramatic, that much is sure.
“Fans of the violence, the nightmares, the freaks and the geeks! While we have one special exhibition match to announce afterwards, our NFC Openweight Grand Prix comes to an end NOW! Over a dozen fighters attempted to scale the horrors we put in front of them and many lost their lives in that attempt at freedom, glory and a wish. Now, we’re left with the three absolute best in the NFC’s first ever triple threat for not only the bragging rights of being this year’s Grand Prix winner, but…”
Alduin unstrapped the belt and held it high above her, that one eye flashing as the eyepatch rumbled and teeth shimmered.
“A chance to face me for the biggest prize the NFC has to offer. Anytime, anywhere. GLORY TO THE NFC!”
The crowd erupted with cheers and chants of “NFC” as they stomped their feet and bellowed at the top of their lungs. They’d been waiting all night for this, we all had. For all the blood, guts and losses I’d seen down there, there was a distinct part of me that was… excited for this. Turning my pre-amp on, I prepared myself for what was to come next.
If I was to end it all here, I’d give the performance of a fucking lifetime.
“Without further delay, we bring you our finalists! First: She fought off winged beasts, vampires from the Far East and showed us why she’s still got the heart of a champion… Nora fuckin’ Zayne!”
Nora walks out, fresh tape on her wrists, ribs and legs, knees padded up and feet bare. She looks calm and collected as she takes her spot opposite Alduin, quietly waiting.
“Second: He is one of only two invitational entries in this tournament and represents The Order Of The Moth, he has a satchel full of LITERAL nightmares and, if you’ll pardon the pun, is the dark horse of this tournament; ladies and gentlemen… Eustace De Kolta!”
Eustace walked out with purpose, but no fancy hat, cape or full suit. Instead, he was wearing his blazer and shirt with the gloves off and only his satchel adorning him. His face sullen and much like Nora’s, focused entirely on the next steps he’d need to take.
I was about to start talking as Alduin finished up her announcements, but Nelle put up a finger and looked down in horror, lip trembling.
“Last but by no means least… She hails from the Hotel Inertia, she ripped Justiano in half, nearly tore the corporeal JJ Watson to pieces, eviscerated the swarms of Teihiihan and nearly took out our NFC Abyss Champion Abaddon The Destroyer… winner of the NFC Wildcard Tourney; “Wendigo” Wendy Hathale!”
Wendy stumbled from the dug out, her hoodie in tatters and the facemask nowhere to be seen. Her eyes were red, wide and darting all around as foam bubbled in her mouth. As soon as she spied the others, she screeched and ran forward on all fours, her clothes splitting as her form rapidly grew into the horrifying unleashed form she’d displayed before, but with far less control behind it. As the stomach grew inward, the thick wiry hair protruded out on the shoulders and that awful malnourished heaving filled my ears, I felt terror run through me.
This wasn’t a Wendy in control, not by a long shot.
Alduin leapt out of dodge and up to her perch, a look of shock and uncertainty across her face as she surveyed the situation below, taking a moment of pause before shouting that phrase that seemed almost ceremonial, but nevertheless served its purpose in snapping me out of my state and hitting record.
“BEGIN!”
-
NFC OPENWEIGHT GRAND PRIX FINALS: EUSTACE DE KOLTA VS NORA ZAYNE VS “WENDIGO” WENDY HATHALE
Eustace had already manoeuvred himself far enough away to open his satchel, without any change in his focused expression or word of warning; the long spindly arms carrying monstrous, hungry hands poured out of the satchel and towards Wendy, grabbing onto each of her limbs and trying to hold her in place.
Nora, watching this and seeing an opportunity, rushed forward and secured a flying knee to Wendy’s jaw, connecting with full force and sending her skull bouncing back before returning to face forward.
“What a stunning display of teamwork by two of the three finalists! In an unexpected turn straight out of a Shakespearean tragedy, we’ve not only seen fan favourite Wendigo Wendy go completely feral as the finals begin, but Nora Zayne and Eustace De Kolta recognising the enemy of their enemy is their friend, even for the briefest of moments! Nelle, glad your brush with death was only that… a brush, but what do you make of this? What’s going to happen in the long run?”
Nelle’s usual cool exterior and knowledgeable bravado was nowhere to be seen. Not due to exhaustion, injury or her earlier fights, but because of what she was seeing down below with Wendy. The woman who had fought so bravely and valiantly when she fell.
Perhaps somewhere in the back of Nelle’s consciousness, she saw what Wendy did, saw HOW she reacted to Nelle falling in that pit. Maybe Wendy felt as if she was drawn to Abaddon, the same way she was. In any case, she shook her head fervently before finally speaking into the microphone as Wendy broke free of the arms, breaking some and biting clean through others, spraying blood across the pit as she tore towards Eustace.
“She’s going to be killed. They all are. Nothing about this was by chance, Sal.”
Wendy let loose a claw and grazed Nora’s shoulder as she let out a pained howl, creating distance with a vicious kick to Wendy’s knee. Nelle persisted.
“Look at it; A former NFC champ who, while undeniably more skilled than most who sign up for these tourneys, has opponents who are either way beneath her in power OR just leave when “their job is done” in Temperance? A Wendigo forced to go through a Wildcard first against an opponent who leaves after “doing as he was told”, then against the Abyss champion who himself is taken out prior to winning? And, of course…”
Nelle looks down and her hands shake, my ears ringing with the eponymous words spoken by Eustace after Wendy’s victory playing alongside his mentioning of what happened to his family at the hands of an errant and ravenous Wendigo…
“The only thing the NFC fears now… is you.”
I could see his grimace flickering with a smile ever so slightly as he pulled the bag open to let out that same monster we saw from the very first fight; The Devourer. Arms draped in paper thin, sallow skin, yellow veins pumping a thick liquid around its translucent body. Beady little eyes stacked atop one another, a mouth filled with black salivating gums and a long spindly tentacle protruding from its mouth.
“A nightmare catcher with a hatred of Wendigos.” I finished, swallowing and feeling my hands shake as the realisation swept over me.
It crawled out with the same kind of reflexes one would expect to see from a tarantula, immediately getting out of the way of Wendy’s attack and drawing away attention from Eustace. As it wrapped its tongue around Wendy, she pulled on the creature with exceptional force, lifting it off of the ground and smashing into the ground, dragging its flailing body towards her and raising a heel, crushing its skull in one motion, the limbs of the devourer tensing before falling limp.
All the while, Eustace was pulling something much different from the satchel, utilising the distraction to pull out a silver dagger with a glint in his eyes. Snapping his fingers, the tentacle whipped up and sliced through Wendy’s chest, puncturing her rib cage and going for her heart.
“I only need pierce that black heart to be rid of you. Clearly, the right call to be made in your current state.” He panted, adrenaline running through him in an uncharacteristic moment of candid behaviour. “ I wanted to like you, Wendy. Truly, I did. But this proves you are different to the others only in your intellect, nothing more. Forgive me.” He tensed his grip on the dagger as the tentacle began pushing on Wendy’s spine, her jaw slack in shock.
“Forgive yourself first, De Kolta. You took your eyes off of another opponent!”
He barely had time to turn before Nora’s elbow collided with his skull, followed with a stiff kick to the neck that dropped De Kolta hard to the ground, sending his satchel and the dagger flying. Nora turned her attention to the situation at hand, rushing forward to try and wrench the mammoth tentacle away from the rapidly deteriorating Wendy, now reverting to her human form as the tentacle bore deeper into her.
Alduin clapped with joy, lapping up every moment of pain, agony and suffering as if it were the finest of cuisines. Eustace stirred on the ground and upon seeing the dagger was closer to him than the satchel, gripped it tight and got to his knees, blood seeping through his teeth and his knees buckling over and over as he stumbled to get it together.
“First time I’ve experienced any pain since that night… how utterly appropriate. But you’re right, Nora Zayne. I overlooked the other great monster in this tournament, the woman who last held the NFC belt. I won’t make that same mistake again.”
Holding it as if it were a throwing knife in a carnival show, he carefully aims in the exact same way Abaddon did to Nelle.
“Zanaya, Rex, Qwong… they all succumbed to something pulling at the strings. They’re going to kill each other before this is over…” I breathe, legs shaking under the table and threatening to bounce against the audio equipment, but I don’t even care. The moment hits me like a freight train and I cannot help but yell into the microphone as time slows to a crawl;
“Eustace De Kolta about to throw that knife directly at you, Nora. Get the fuck out of dodge, NOW!”
He threw it with prejudice, the silver sheen glinting as it cut the air and sped the length of the pit, hurtling towards Nora’s back as she desperately tried to remove the tentacle. He smiled, she turned to see.
There was a dull thud and the sound of flesh being split, a gasp from the crowd and the soft dripping of blood hitting the canvas. My heart stopped and I felt the world stop with me in fear of what was to come.
Wendy, now human and with tentacle still attached, held out a defiant hand that allowed the dagger to puncture clean through. Digits twitching and shaking as the other hand tried to form a fist and pull the dagger out. When she did so, still breathing heavily, she stuck the tentacle in the back with all her might. It writhed and flailed before falling limp and detaching itself, a circular scorch mark on her back with a faint symbol still visible, but no deep wound observable.
“I don’t know what you did, De Kolta, or if you even knew you were doing it. But if we’re gonna do this, I do it with a clear head.” She dropped to a knee as Eustace stared incredulously at her, unsure of how to respond. She coughed heavily before regaining her composure. “Looks like whatever I throw at you next will be it. Whoever is left standing can take on the Tony Jaa wannabe behind me. Seems only fair since this is personal, right?” She flashed him a grin and it was so disarming even I couldn’t help but grin with her, Nelle shakes her head and chuckles to herself.
“Every time, there’s always one like her.” Eustace staggers to his feet, smiling but clearly not able to withstand much more himself.
“I wouldn’t have it any other way, Hathale. I didn’t come this far to falter n-.” Before he’d finished, Wendy cleared the length of the pit and stood in front of him, hair now a tangled mess as it blew down her face and her expression blank.
“Too slow.” She hissed before striking him once in the stomach, a shot so hard it split the seam in his waistcoat and sent the buttons flying. He spat out blood and stumbled back, groaning while keeping his eyes firmly fixed on her.
“I need to avenge them. I need to fulfil my promise to the order… I can’t let something like you wander freely, knowing what you could do to anyone else!” He cried, dashing for the satchel as Wendy dashed forward again.
This time, she lashed out with a strike that was aimed for Eustace’s stomach, but instead caught the satchel.
The ensuing chaos was nothing short of a maelstrom of darkness and a wall of sound. As if a bomb had gone off, huge dust clouds kicked up around the venue and a low droning followed with several distinct footsteps, cries and undulating sounds crept through the venue. Whatever Wendy had done to the satchel, it’d allowed everything Eustace kept within the satchel to begin spilling out at once.
But within a few moments of the sounds to spill out of the venue, the dust cleared and silence reigned once more. Wendy was shielding an unconscious Eustace, deep scratches on her body while Nora stood with that same black sheen over her as she held a shadow-like creature by the neck, tossing it aside as she spied Wendy.
There was a momentary lull as the two women’s eyes met, Nora cracked her neck and Wendy moved Eustace to the side of the pit, panting and exhausted but still game.
“You give me anything less and I’ll know.” Wendy quipped, rotating her shoulders and taking in some deep breaths. “A cornered beast is more dangerous than a confident one.”
Nora smirked, the black sheen still visible but fading as she opened her arms.
“Of course, which is why I’ll let you get the first shot.”
“You’ll let me approach, no bullshit?” Wendy’s eyes narrowed as she began to close the gap.
“Can’t beat the shit out of you without you getting closer.” Nora grinned, tension in the air.
Wendy gritted her teeth and faked a left hook, driving her right fist under Nora’s jaw in a searing uppercut that landed clean and sent Nora’s neck backwards.
But Nora did not falter.
With the arm in range, she held the wrist and with one well-placed punch to the elbow joint completely broke the arm. She screamed and grabbed Nora with her good arm, holding onto her wrist tape as she fired volley after volley into Nora’s stomach.
But again, Nora did not falter.
Instead, she absorbed every shot until Wendy inevitably tired, waited for her chance and struck with a left high kick to the head.
As Wendy fell, her hand reached out and grabbed Nora’s wrist tape again, the only thing holding her up the sheer will inside her.
Wendigo Wendy was out cold.
The fight was over.
As the moment calmed, the crowd erupted into cheers and Alduin stood up, clapping and laughing heartily. I took to the microphone and did what I do best.
“That was the most intense fight I have EVER seen not just here but anywhere. This was an all-time classic I would love to see run back again and my god is it good to say that knowing that all three survived against the odds?! What a final. What competitors. Give it up for Nightmare Catcher Extraordinaire Eustace De Kolta, Wildcard Winner Wendigo Wendy Hathale and the NFC Openweight Grand Prix Tournament Winner: Nora Fucking Zayne!”
It was a beautiful moment punctuated by the intense stare down between these two women. Nora declared her desire to fight and so in 3 hours, they’d go toe to toe for the ultimate prize;
The NFC Openweight Championship.
Glory to the NFC.

Hail Travelers,
Welcome to Verum Weekly. A weekly post to summarize all the game sessions that happen in the week prior. Hope you like it.
​
Friday

The Tearing Veil Ep. 4 (SootheBe11)

We start with the Unwise Five (since Nidhogg went ahead to the Beggar’s Rest), gaining their informant O’Brian and walking out into the street from the Jailhouse. O’Brian and the Unwise Five move towards the Beggar’s Rest where the Old halfling grandma gave them food to eat. However, Flamewrath doesn’t eat poor people’s food and proceeds to walk out and buys a falafel to eat, Raber on the other hand, wishes to eat intercourse (meat) and he proceeds to harass the elderly woman about it. The party then goes to rest and night turns to day, the old halfling has arranged breakfast and is smoking a blunt while the Unwise Six and O’Brian begin to eat, Flamewrath and Vim create an apparatus for the old lady, and the party talk about important issues as to what they need to do as they head outside the tavern.
They would need a bracelet to enter into the White Pantheon’s place, the counting house, which is an enormous white structure, well stocked with guards, and that is locked up tight. This bracelet can be obtained from a worker who goes to a hidden temple of Glory to train acolytes, luckily one of O’Brian’s informants, Gallaton, is able to accompany them to the temple and assist in getting the bracelet. The Unwise Six proceed toward the temple where they hide under the shade of a tree and their contact, unfortunately is not subtle, but walks with many scars and swagger. The party is greeted by Gallaton and is informed of the situation in the Cathedral: the captain Vivarian Kine of the Daborakians, a wizard from the Mage’s Guild Nimi Loso, some priest of Vavren, and then a powerful Night Guard named Kaisen.
The group starts to plan an attack on the temple of Glory, and they ultimately decide that Gallaton and Vim attack from the side, the others would hide in a bush, and Wisp would lure the acolytes towards the team. Wisp succeeds in deceiving the acolytes and Nimi Lossoo of a broken wagon down the street and she proceeds to guide them towards the group hiding in the bushes. A fight begins and Gallaton screams in joy as he dashes towards the cathedral, breaking through a window while Vim runs towards the aid of his party. The party recognizes that the mage seems to have access to third level spells while the acolytes are not as adept in training. Nimi runs toward the cathedral for help because of the dire situation, as a yelling voice is heard from the Cathedral and an acolyte flys through a window.
Raber attempts to chase the mage and he sees that another person protrudes from the trees, Firebrand leaps out, attempting to fend off Raber using her flame sword. Then the roof of the temple bursts open as Gallaton is thrown outwards, and a woman clad in red armor and wielding a katana chases after him. The battle continues, as another woman, a priest, appears healing Nimi, Raber proceeds to bash Firebrand’s head in, and Vim identifies the Nightguard to be infused with the power of lycanthropy. The Unwise Six seems to be gaining the upper hand, murdering the acolytes until the captain rushes outside to aid the priest and mage, while Gallaton and night guard continue to duel on the roof then onto the ground clashing their swords together. The captain seems to have all the markings of a captain of Orde, masterwork weapons, and is immune to fear, charm, and compulsion, but is weak on his left side and if is flanked, then the attackers gain advantage .
Angorn calls on the power of the black sun to toll the dead, killing Nimi, as Nidhogg runs towards the cathedral. As NIdhogg enters the temple, he rolls the black dice, and the temple is filled with a dark presence, the Gambler Black has now taken over the church of Glory. Nidhogg then gains the power of the Gambler, as he turns to a shadowy figment in a toon-like structure, getting half damage from physical sources and can roll a 1d6 whenever he attacks, in addition whenever a weapon hits, he rolls an additional 1d6 which does not damage the opponent, but if the same number appears on this die, then the entirety of his damage doubles. The Unwise Six continues to bash and slash through the captain and the priest, with Vim using his chain whip, Wisp insulting the captain, Flamewrath using firebolt, Raber bashing his tree, and Angorn calling upon his God to crush these mortal creatures.
The party proceeds to humiliate and murder the captain, as Gallaton and the night guard’s final clash ensues. Gallaton raises his blade to go all in on to Kaisen, but she slashes through him killing him in the process. Galalton then addresses the party that it is up to them, as he dies with a huge grin and a thumbs up. The night guard Kaisen, turns to the Unwise Six and she beckons them forward.
​
Saturday

The Herald's Call Ep. 2

The party rushes to the assassin's hideout in hopes that they find an antidote to save Jaxon. Using the map and their own intuition, they manage to find a hidden encampment in the forests guarded by hooded figures. The party listen in and it seems that a guard is asking his captain to give him a raise because he is about to be a father. The two then talk around a campfire about solace and tribulations of being a dad while the others listen in. The party also notices that every person in the camp has a symbol of a shattered seven-pointed star on their breastplates.
Arienne sneaks to the nearest tent and find some encrypted documents. She takes them and heads back to the party to give it to them. Midas notices that all their supplies came from one place: Hector's Hymn (The Inn from the Sprinkle of Fate Campaign). When Arienne looks at the documents, she is able to decipher them as it is written in Thieves' Cant. She uncovers that their is a traitor in the White Council that seems to be giving this group direct support and this individual is in Fireport. Riku manages to sneak around and enter the Captain's tent. There he can see the usual accommodations but something catches his eye. On the desk, Riku finds a crumpled piece of paper that seems to be for the "Unwise Six" and a seven-pointed star but the points are taken off. He looks more closely at the idol and finds a small violet light in the center of the star. Riku instinctively feels wrong looking at it and runs out with the the poster. The party regathers and prepares for combat.
Midas lights one of the tents on fire and the the party initiate their attack. Athough Azylea goes down during the fight, the rest of the party gets her back up and take out all the enemies reining victorious. Midas snuff his fires out and they begin to loot the encampment. The party finds the antidote on the Captain's body and they also find 100 gold pieces and a small silver chest in the Captain's tent. Arienne opens the chest using her tools and she finds a pair of wedding rings, a lock of a girl's hair, and a blood-stained note saying how his family is waiting for him.
All is well for the party but they still have a pressing matter in their hands: the shattered seven-pointed star. Archeal tries to use 'Divine Sense" on the idol but a loud screech enters his mind cutting off the connection. He couldn't find what it is but he does know one thing; something is watching them. Riku sees that the this idol was shattered by mortal hands but the corruptions seems to be spreading inside the idol; he needs to break it to find out. Midas then walks in the tent and cast "Identify" on the Idol. His mind is suddenly pulled into the light and Midas watches the Herald's corruptive power destroying Verum in one strike. Midas resists the violet's power and see a key hidden in the light. He reaches out for it and then abruptly comes back to reality. The party asks what he saw and Midas relays to them. He then notices that there is a key in his hands. Midas inspects the key noticing that the pommel has a five pointed star with one section glowing with a orange light. The party heads back with the antidote and key while leaving the idol behind.
They reach the laboratory with short time and the antidote is administered to Jaxon. Maxwell thanks the party for their efforts and Midas gives him the key he got from the idol while the party tells him about the events they witnessed. Maxwell explains that the key might be as old as Jaxon and it might open the door to Jaxon's home. He also explains that the assailants are from the Order of the Shattered Star. The enemy is starting their move. The party then rests and prepare to move to another location.
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Shadow of Tyre Ep. 16 (RoyalCaster)

The party spends the breaths they catch from after the battle with the Speaker, to check up on the damage and the people of the camp such as Angor, Theodore Tyne the blacksmith, specifically Moe checks up on Odin, and give him an update on the mission he gave Moe about getting his people land of their own.
The party gather at the beach and deliberate whether to go down and talk to the White Terror at the step of set to possibly set him free, they get down to him and decide to conversate with him, and ask him that it would be helpful for the white terror to elaborate to them and give him more information to get a better feeling about possibly releasing him. He says that if he would be free that he would have to go deeper and relay information to his master. The party picks up on that and asks about who his master is, the White Terror explains that his master is called the Sunken King. Eustace asks about his name, and after some hesitation he tells the party that his name is Dellaananus . Toot gets fed up with this fairy footing around, and pushes further to either just help them or not, but Dellaananus informs him about the precarious game Toot plays everytime he speaks. Toot is filled with confusion, and asks what he means by that, Dellaananus explains to him that his curse wasn’t removed, but replaced with a violet curse. Realizing this Toot is saddened and leaves them Moe follows. The three of them come to a conclusion and release Dellaananus. Moe decides to have a talk with Toot to try and soften the reality that has come crashing down onto Toot. Moe decides that the work he is doing for his wife and her possession might come in handy with what is happening with Toot.
Toot remains, sulking on the beach. The rest of the party decides to talk to the chord who has joined the camp; Mirage. Eventually the conversation gets to the point Moe asks if she wants him to look into her with his cyclopean eye. Moe is near blinded by the brightness of Mirage’s visage within the eye, he sees in her past Mirage and her sisters being attacked by the red man. It shows that path of vengeance that has led Mirage toward the path of the lifestream, and Inu. Finally he sees her singing with 2 others that have their faces obscured, and deeper he sees that something he thinks that should be kept asleep is being brought back by them. Moe snaps back to himself
They meet back up with Derk darkwater and discuss the unfinished business done they had in Eassemear. Toot hands a note to Igor the merchant about not being able to talk and asks if he has anything about that. Igor offers a potion that lets him speak with his mind for an hour.
The party inquires about the council possibly being able to give aid to the camp. They’ll be setting up trade between the camp and Eassemear, and all of the council decline to join personally, all but Woku. Woku decides he will be the representative of Eassmeare, and comes with. Raost and Moe head to library Raost tries to find something about Ori, but finds nothing. Moe looks into possible power words and finds one transcribed in Orcish “Nors Faud” meaning standup bring back party members that have gone unconscious. Eustace gets his robe from the tailor. Toot decides to talk to the Mask priest merchant who had the feather that let him talk to Toot through his head. The priest comes up short of things to offer him, but regails the legend of a panacea that can cure all, that of a Phoenix Feather. Toot visits the w a n d and r o d merchant from earlier, and hands him a note if he could imbue a wand with the potion he got from Igor. The merchant agrees to do this for Toot. Ahst heads to the Chamber of Mirrors to contact Tomen. He Foreworns Ahst that the 3rd changeling is on their way and that the path for the vega will be open. He also warns that the attack from the speak was not that last and gives her a date for when the next attack will be.
With all their business taken care of they head back to camp. Ahst immediately rushes to Braktor asking for the box, but Braktor inquires about Toot being able to marry him and Hackne they ignore that. Ahst takes the tapestry and puts it in the box, and warns that to never touch it no one is to interact with it. They also tell Braktor what happened with Toot, and he understands his troubles. Ahst tells the group what Tomen told her about the impending attack. Ahst, Braktor, Bellanovan, and Mirage go to visit Inu. Inu gets to meet with the first chord, and Ahst is heated asking about what can Inu do to help them as she feels Inu has left them on their own. All this is set aside by Inu assuring them that there will eventually be a cumulative effect once the 3rd guardian is with them.
They finally join back together, Mirage decides to join the party and head back into the labyrinth.
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Sunday

Broken Bonds Ep. 12 (RoyalCaster)

After Bryan successfully completes the crucible, the party is invited for celebration in the Citadel. During the celebrations, Remag’s right eye begins to ache and he goes outside for some fresh air. While out on the courtyard by himself, something whispers to Remag filling him with pure fear. Nox’s violet detecting scales on her tail light up, and her instincts sharpen. Noticing Remag is missing, Nox rounds up the rest of the party to find him. Regrouping, the party hears the whispers of something malicious, and it rounds off it’s sentence with a sharp “Die!”. The Violet Servant, The Cacophonic Collective, appears. The battle begins by the servant immediately putting Nox in stasis, unable to be harmed but also incapable of aiding the party. Clashes are exchanged and the party discovers that their enemy is able to create shadow duplicates of them, and once marked, these shadows themselves can also be duplicated. The Collective can also mark the party members so that if one gets hit, all of them gets hit. The party managed to come out on top, by being nimble enough to avoid multiple crucial attacks from the servant, and dishing out quick serious punishment for it in return. At the servant’s dying breath, it sacrifices one of its shadows to revive itself. However, the party downs the servant enough times until it is out of duplicates and fades away. They stand victorious.
Once the fight is over, Remag is deemed worthy by defeating a violet enemy. His eye produces the rune of the ranger stone, that being a powerful artifact that rangers use to get in touch of their nature powers, but this rune particularly is ancient, and from a face in the cacophonic collective who happened to be a Taladonic arcane ranger themselves. Remag considers who this rune was meant for and, with Hashbrown recent performance in the fight against the violet enemy in mind, he bestows the rune into him, planting it onto his forehead, and the ancient teaching of Taladoni fills Hashbrown’s head. He becomes a seeker gaining a gray hood with blue streaks through it, and his robe is tied at a central sash. With this new found power Hashbrown’s bow gains three rune slots that can be upgraded later in their adventures.
Eventually the Nightgaurd bearing witness to this party’s victory against this great common enemy, they surround them, and begin to cheer. Coming this far, breaking their bonds, and liberating others, this party follows the path the eye is laying out before them as the leylines remain unguarded and vulnerable for what soon to come, but for the tale of Broken Bonds has come to an end.
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Monday

Heart of Tyre Ep. 14 (av5hadow)

Alleo gives the party time to prepare for the fight. The consumed potions are restored. Ives recovers his standard arrows, but any used amber arrows are gone. The party buffs up before they get into formation. As Alleo gets into his fighting stance, his wedding ring shatters. His bravado, strength, and willpower left his soul. As he picks up the remnants of his ring, indigo crystals grow around him and begin to return to the crystalline ground. However, the spirit of his beloved, thrumming with Sevenic power, pulls him from the crystals. Before Minthis (the Seven who sacrificed herself in Soul of Tyre) leaves for the afterlife, she encourages Alleo to fight. Alleo turns to the party, stating that he will test them. If they are to bear the responsibility of his wife, he will make sure that they are worthy of it. The Seven stands behind Alleo.
Alleo has the following traits: Martial Master, Defender, Merciful, Sorrowful, Deadly, Morale Breaker, and Sevenic. In addition, Alleo has two initiatives, Skylord and Emperor. Ives is the one who makes the first move, immediately flying upwards. Skylord Alleo then gets on his ship, swinging his saber against each Tops member before challenging Morc. Dranf attempts to hit Alleo, but the boss parries all of his attacks. Emperor Alleo then activates an unidentified glyph then “stores an attack.” Morc identifies the Glyph of Warding, which increases Alleo’s defense for every attack made against him.
Ives stealths behind Madd Morc. The Skylord uses Reposition to be next to Seren so he can take two swings at her. Derok fails to use Doom’s Herald on Alleo and then drinks a potion of Heroism, taking damage for taking those actions with the second twice as strong as the first. Neve calls back her Shadow Dagger she had missed in the last round, also taking damage for this action. Turns out that the Glyph of Punishment damages enemies within 60ft who takes an action. This does not affect people who are readying actions. Luckily, only one Glyph can be active.
Alleo designates the area for the Unfortunate Circumstance to perform Ramming Speed. Derok, Morc, Neve, and Seren are in the area. Before Derok Dimension Doors out of the way, he successfully uses Doom Herald, forcing disadvantage on Alleo’s rolls. Neve moves out of the area, and Seren maneuvers around Alleo to get out of the ship’s way. She learns of Shock and Awe, a devastating attack that targets all enemies but can only be used when there’s a critical hit. Emperor Alleo uses Commanding Gaze on Morc, preventing him from moving or teleporting.
Seeing the Skyship speeding in, Ives lassos and pulls Morc out of the way. Ives then shoots an Amber Arrow at Alleo, causing some of the amber to cover Minthis. Alleo moves away from everyone, using up his stored attacks to use Daring Swing three times against everyone but Seren who was close enough to avoid the attacks. She readies Dispel Magic at the end of Alleo’s Emperor turn. Alleo Repositions next to Morc and activates the Glyph of Torment, a glyph that damages any moving enemy. However, it was promptly Dispelled by Seren.
Ives learns that Alleo’s Bravado will allow him to negate any ability to control his actions or limit his movement at the cost of HP. No Hold Person for this boss. Derok identifies the hidden ability that Alleo’s saber has. If his HP is below half and he crits, he may attack again. Neve learns that Alleo is fighting with Minthis’s love, and that if he reaches a critical point, he will go through a Sevenic Surge and will then fight with the power of the Seven.
Ives lands another Amber Arrow on Alleo and feels that if he continues doing this, he will sever Alleo’s connection to Minthis. Alleo moves away from the rest of the group to prepare something. Derok realises that Alleo is waiting for Doom’s Herald to disperse and prepares another Daring Swing after Derok’s turn. Derok attempts to stop this with another Doom’s Herald but fails this time. Alleo uses Daring Swing twice, downing and locking out (should be “killing”, but Merciful is in play) Seren with a crit. Neve rushes to Seren and gets her back up with a Revivify Potion. Seren will plant her Sakura Tree. Alleo Repositions right next to Seren and activates Glyph of Torment. Morc realises Alleo’s plan. Alleo plans to use Shock and Awe to force the party in a very difficult situation.
Ives performs a fly-by rescue on Seren to get her away from Alleo. Alleo then activates Shock and Awe, downing Seren and severely injuring Morc. He then moves away from Morc and Derok and sets Ramming Speed on Seren, Neve, and Ives.
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Tuesday

Soul of Tyre Ep. 13 (SootheBe11)

The party recoups after the battle with the Violet speaker, identifying that the staff on the ground that Ano found to have the mark of the green triangle inscribed on it. It appears to be a beacon of some kind, a communication device that is sending out a magical signal. They further know that the green symbol has some sort of divination on it and that there seems to be an inscription written in Cyclopian. The party sets aside the staff for now, and they start to bicker about the marriage setup, and suddenly a swirl of the lifestream forms onto Bellanovan’s songblade as well as Ahst.
The two begin to dance as Braktor weaves his strands, and Mirage sings a song, a third individual, pale skinned and long-haired, eventually forms in the middle of the two guardians of the lifestream pointing his song blade up. Guy has been transported to the camp and is now in the middle of Belanovan and Ahst; Bellanovan then explains to Guy that he is the third guardian and that Gruff and Erin are his refractions. Guy proceeds to explain that he is a sexually active dhampir, where he came from, and how he is very confused as to how he got into Camp Last Stand in the first place.
Then, Braktor, Bellanovan, Ahst, Mirage, and Guy get transported to the Shattered Gate and they start to understand they are running out of time. The three guardians stand where they are needed, Braktor continues to weave the strands of life, Mirage starts to sing the chords of the life stream, and Inu joins moving its hands along with the rhythm and swirls it back into the life stream. They have restored the life stream, and now the broken pieces of it can be properly returned to its proper place. Inu explains to Guy that the Life Stream is the beating heart of life itself, Guy is also part of that lifestream even if he’s a dhampir; Bellanovan then suggests that they go to the Red Star to undergo the trial of the prism, and Inu agrees that it is the right path to pursue.
Inu explains that the Petulant lords are on the move, how they are the Lords of Decay, and with Braktor’s information about the staff, one of them has come in contact with the camp. Inu then asks Braktor to find the last changeling for they need three changelings to open the path towards the Trigram Isles. The four are teleported back to the camp, however, a force forbids them and instead they are teleported near the planet of Maltos, where they see the Herald begin to approach closer and closer, consuming the planet. The three songblades begin their dance, the chord sings, and the weaver weaves the strands of life, attempting to transport themselves back into the camp before being caught by the Herald grasp.
They do so, with the knowledge of the Herald nearing, and that there are Talodoni symbols present in Maltos. Braktor, however, has been through many trials, but for now, he wishes to be wed to Hackne. As the people repairing the camp from the Violet attack, hears the sound of the Vizier calling them to participate in the ceremony of marriage. Braktor stands by the Vizier's side and the Vizier makes the rune of earth onto Braktor’s forehead, undergoing the ritual of marriage of the Dwarves. The Vizier then undergoes the ritual of marriage from Hackne’s people asking for the blessing of Raquel. The Vazieir then continues to speak, telling them of their vows of protection, laughter, and last breath in which both of them agree. The party proceed to engage in an after-party, darkening the tents, and for now, drink and sing with joy in their voices. Braktor and Hackne goes to a private tent to have their honeymoon ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) while Guy, Mirage, and Ozzie have an orgy.
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Wednesday

Death and Debts Ep. 10

(After 20 Order was gained because the Astral Traveler has gained her physical form, a threshold was met for this campaign. They could either stay their normal path or stray from it and fight directly against the enemy. They chose to aid in the cause against the Herald.)
As the party goes to the front door of a manor, a dwarf stands before them asking for a changeling. Terryn steps ups and asks who he is. The dwarf introduces himself as Braktor Ironbellows (from Soul of Tyre). The then does their usual antics and probe Braktor to talking about his life while they talk about their ventures with him. Everybody then moves to the bar to talk some more and all of them find Bellethar still lying on the ground. Braktor wakes Bellethar up, the two mingle a bit, and Braktor asks Bellathar to leave to which he happily obliges. After that, Braktor and Terryn have a talk about her nature but before that, Braktor warns Terryn not to change into him. Being the baddest bitch that she is, Terryn changes into Braktor anyways. Memories of Braktor flow into the changelings mind; Terryn rewitness Braktor taking out his violet eye and endures all the horror with it. The changeling returns to her original from and runs to the corner in pain and tears. Braktor then tries to calm down the unrest from the party and offers to take them to is "island of sexy himbo boys" if they listen to him. The party then learns about the situation with the enemy and the need of a third changeling to complete the Trigram Isles. Braktor then shows a map of the enemy movements to the party highlighting that the enemy plans to attack the Hall of Heroes by the Razor Cliffs in Daborak. The girls must travel to the Razor Cliffs and seek the Lord of Blades for more instructions.
As Braktor leaves the bar, he recognized a women as Bonnota Ad'daire. Braktor then talks to her and explain that he knew her parents. Bonnota asks why Braktor knows about her parents and he tells Bonnota that her mother, Minthis, once saved his life. Bonnota wishes that she could know her parents. Braktor explains that Minthis would discard anything that her dangerous lifestyle would harm and the death of her husband affected her greatly. Braktor then gives Minthis' ring to Bonnota and tells her that her mother's sacrifice saved many lives. Bonnota sit downs in tears reflecting on what she heard while Braktor leaves.
Meanwhile, Vaeri and Revlis study the map given by Braktor and they try understand what the next plan of action should be as Braktor didn't tell them. Revlis also notices that there is the mark of the Silent Knights and a message saying that if they ever need help, ask them. When Terryn looks at the map, her "Eyes of the Rune Keeper" show them the instructions of their two tasks. They could either go the the Razor Cliffs or Camp Last Stand. The party decide they will go to the camp first and prepare to leave. However, the antics and sexual tensions are as high as usual so the party does a lot of fanservice for a very long time. Eventually, they gather and head to Zazgore. The party explain their new mission and ask for transport to Camp Last Stand. Zazgore obliges and summons a portal to the dream leading them to the camp. In the dream realm, they meet Jarix who guides them to the dream. Jairx also explains the party about the dream and warns that their path will not be an easy one. Eventaully, Jarix passes the party off to Eustace (from Shadow of Tyre) who leads the party the rest of the way and they finally arrive at Camp Last Stand.
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Thanks for reading.

Standard Disclaimer: I do not take credit for the setting, this story is set in the They Are Smol universe, written by our very own u/tinyprancinghorse.
TPH has a Website, a Patreon, and also a Discord if you need more smol shenanigans.
The first Smol Detective story can be read starting Here.
The second Smol Detective story can be read starting Here.
There will be some spoilers/references to prior SD stories in this one, so consider yourself duly warned.
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First Chapter
Previous Chapter
Next Chapter
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In the previous chapter
Zara and the Things would make a good Band Name.
Martin got an Ultimatum. He ignored it, of Course.
Rory did a Sneaky.
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In this chapter
The Silken Feather does a Beguile, Maybe.
The Veridicator does an Investigate, Definitely.
The Con Is On.
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The woman known only as 'Thing One' stared down at the holographic display that appeared to float 'within' the table. A few blue feathers brushed against her shoulder as she leaned forward and gave a thoughtful hum. She was surprised at how quickly their Karnakian 'guest' became just another member of the team, although when the Silken Feather smiled her fanged rictus still gave Thing One a queasy thrill of fear. Oscar stood on the other side of the table from her, lost in his own pondering.
"This will be do-able," said Thing One. She looked up at the broad-shouldered American. "It will be tight quarters for you."
Oscar shrugged. "I'll deal with it. We need to keep the diameter as small as possible."
"It's your coffin," she replied. "Most of these components I can get ahold of, but we'll also need a very compact yet high-output power source."
"[I've taken care of that,]" replied the Silken Feather. "[One of the items I brought with me is a zero-point energy device.]"
Thing One kept her face neutral. Money didn't mean so much anymore, but still...such an item would be worth a fortune on Earth. She began thinking through how to discreetly get hold of it afterwards.
The Karnakian's snout lowered and her four eyes stared deeply into Thing One's face. "[I will, of course, need that device back after the job.]"
"Of course!" replied Thing One, far too cheerfully. She knew without looking that Oscar would be sporting an infuriating smirk and felt a flare of mild anger in her gut.
A soft thwap sounded from nearby. Upon a stool sat a large block of foam with a crudely spray-painted bullseye on it. A playing card now sprouted from off to one side of the bullseye's center.
Thing One spun to take her irritation out on the card-thrower. "Do you have to do that?"
"Yeah, it helps me think," replied Rory. He stood about twenty paces from the target, holding a deck of playing cards. He slipped the next top card off of the deck and squinted at his target, pinching the card in between a thumb and forefinger while holding it parallel to the floor. In a sudden swift move he snapped his hand forward, spinning the card like a Frisbee. The card sank neatly in the center of the target, just next to its predecessor.
Thing One performed a sarcastic golf-clap. "Congratulations, now we can rest easy in case we ever get attacked by a rampaging bit of foam."
The Silken Feather, in contrast, looked absolutely delighted at the feat. Her toe-claws clacked against the warehouse floor as she walked over to Rory. "[May I try one?]"
The cardsharp looked up at her in surprise. "Um, sure?" He slipped another card off of his deck and handed it to her. She looked at the small cardboard rectangle in her claws, then back up at Rory. Maybe it was Thing One's imagination, but she could swear that the huge alien's expression and posture could be best described as...coy?
"[I'm afraid I didn't see exactly how you held it. Can you give me some pointers?]"
Rory stared blankly for a moment, then shrugged and pulled out a card for himself. He took up the same throwing position as he had before. "All right, you want to hold the card like so, okay?"
The Karnakian nodded, her face split in a very fanged grin as she mirrored Rory's posture.
"Yeah, that grip looks good but you need to hold it...do you mind if I move your arm?"
"[Not at all!]"
He reached out and adjusted her feathered appendage, and Thing One didn't miss the little thrilled shudder in the Karnakian's tail that resulted from the physical contact.
The Russian sidled over to Oscar. "Is that monster flirting with him?" she whispered as the Silken Feather made her first throw. It sailed up and over the target, missing the block completely.
Oscar gave the barest shrug and his own whispered response to Thing One. "Who knows? Maybe she's got a thing for portly guys with beards."
The Karnakian's grin grew even wider. "[Can I try again?]" She took every opportunity in the following lesson to initiate or ask for touching by Rory. He was a patient tutor, seemingly oblivious to her advances (if that was indeed what the feathered alien was up to). After another ten minutes of coaching, the Silken Feather's card landed almost dead-center in the target.
"Good job!" said Rory. Then he added a muffled "Hnnngmmph!" as she hugged him into her floofed-out chest feathers. His cards fell to the floor in a sprawl as he wriggled against her grip.
The side door to the warehouse opened with a thump, bringing in a cold draft of air and one pleased-looking Zara. She strode in, her aquiline face set in smiling triumph. "I found our pigeon. He's got the right security level, also has a thing for gambling..." She trailed off and raised an eyebrow at the bit of intimacy before her. "Should I give you two some alone time?"
Thing One smirked as the Silken Feather hastily released Rory. The man straightened his jacket and tried to look dignified and composed, as if he hadn't just been swept off his feet.
"[No, haha!]" said the Karnakian. "[I was just thanking [Rory]! He taught me a new skill!]"
"Did he now," replied Zara, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
That sarcasm went sailing right over the Silken Feather's head like a badly-thrown playing card. "[Yes, he's quite skilled!]" The huge alien looked down at Rory and winked one eye. "[I like it when my partners have skills. It makes interactions much more fun.]"
Thing One had to bite her lip to avoid laughing at the resulting look of panic on Rory's face.
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Oscar, to his very great not-surprise, found himself confronted by Rory not long after. He was in the middle of figuring out a bit of tricky fingering for an old Dorarizin drinking song. It wasn't easy; the xenos had never heard of Guido D'Arezzo, so as far as humans were concerned the aliens' musical notation was something out of a cross-eyed nightmare. In the midst of his musical musing, he felt a large bearded presence standing in front of him. He looked up with a mild smile into Rory's face.
"What the fuck is she up to?" Rory hissed. His normally half-lidded eyes were now wide and staring with fear, the look of a deer who might just have caught wind of somebody nearby wearing an obnoxious orange vest. He had his hands on his hips, and he darted his head around in obvious fear of catching the attentions of a certain blue-feathered teammate.
The larger human reached up and booped Rory in the middle of his forehead. "Don't ask me, buddy. I haven't been around Karnakians all that much."
Rory bared his teeth, but it was more a show of exasperation than anything else. "Oh, as opposed to us plebians who never FUCKING set eyes on one of the gods-be-damned raptors until a certain shaven-headed menace and his Russian buddy decided to just let one of 'em loose on Earth, right?"
Oscar raised a finger. "Let's be specific, here. Valya is not my buddy."
"Fuck. You. With. A. Moldy. Breadstick. What is she UP TO?" Rory put a hand over his mouth at his near-shout towards the end.
Oscar set aside his guitar with a sigh. "Karnakians, whatever their other faults, are very much like us. They're kinda enthusiastic and very spiritual, but beyond that they can vary just as much as you or I." He made a rueful grimace and shrugged. "Shit, dude, I don't even know her real name. But from what little I know she views herself as the ultimate thief."
Rory blew out a breath. "Yeah, so?"
"So? So you just so happened to demonstrate quite the ability in that area, what with that little slight-of-hand demonstration when you first met." Oscar slung his guitar back into his lap and plinked out a few alien chords. "And then you went and did that card-throwing act. At the very least, my guess is she wants to recruit you to join her in her life of crime." Oscar's face settled into an evil grin. "But who can say? Maybe she just wants to marry you."
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Captain Rgrarshok stood at the front of the empty bridge, drinking in the sight of the lovely blue-and white crescent planet Dirt stretching to either side of the holographic display. She heard the tick-tack of toe-claws behind her. From the cadence of that tapping, she knew those claws belonged to a certain white-furred Veridicator. "{No news yet, Hnrahnan,}" Rgrarshok said without turning around.
"{This is intolerable,}" growled Hnrahnan as she stepped up beside the Captain. Her head barely came up even to the giant Dorarizin's shoulder.
"{We agreed to give them time to complete the mission.}"
"{It's been three weeks with no word!}"
"{Not exactly. We've gotten 'everything proceeding as planned' messages from Little-Sniffer, but nothing else.}"
Hnrahnan crossed her arms and huffed. "{We don't even know what their plan is.}"
"{That's also by design. We're not involved, so this remains an affair between tiny-chomper factions and out of both of our jurisdictions.}"
"{Yes, yes. It makes sense, but that doesn't curtail my craving for information.}" The Veridicator's muzzle twitched briefly in a sad smile. "{I guess that's what one could call an occupational hazard.}"
The Captain chuckled. "{I suppose so.}"
The pair stood in silence as they regarded the planet below. Rgrarshok exerted every bit of her considerable self-control to act natural. She'd participated in circumventing one of the most important laws of the Senate by letting that feathered menace travel to the surface of Dirt, and if the Veridicator caught the slightest hint of worry in her posture or voice then...well, then Hnrahnan would not rest until she'd dug the truth out of her.
"{I'm glad to see you doing well,}" said Hnrahnan after a while. "{I was worried about you for a long while.}"
Rgrarshok looked down at her with a surprised set to her ears. "{Really?}"
"{Of course. Leaving the Inquisition as you did was...well, I didn't know where you'd wind up. The best I'd imagined was as a mid-level XO on some tramp cargo-hauler.}"
The Captain settled a giant paw on Hnrahnan's shoulder. "{You should have had more faith in me.}"
Hnrahnan sighed and placed her own paw over Rgrarshok's. "{You're right. I'm glad that you're still an investigator, even if it is for the Senate. And I like your crew. Not to mention I'm pleased with Bgrarh, he seems to be a good and steady mate. You deserve that.}"
Rgrarshok knew there was more coming, so she waited. Hnrahnan said nothing else, so she finally prompted her. "{I sense an unspoken 'however'.}"
"{It's Little-Sniffer. I know you trust him, but I don't. Not yet. His history is far too obscure, especially where [Martin] is concerned.}"
The Captain could smell what was coming, but played along. "{There are ways to get around that obscurity.}"
Hnrahnan stepped around in front of Rgrarshok, blocking the view of the fertile planet outside. She had a gentle half-smile on her face. "{Such an action would cross too many lines for me. I'm a servant of the Empire, not the Senate.}" She peered up at the Captain. "{Whereas you serve the Senate, not the Empire.}"
Rgrarshok sighed. "{Ask your question.}"
"{Oh, there's no question about it. You're far too canny to let some random tiny-chomper run loose on your ship without knowing everything about him.}" Hnrahnan leaned back and crossed her arms. "{Tell me I'm wrong.}"
The Captain stared back steadily, and then shrugged. "{Very well. I committed a gross invasion of privacy and got ahold of Little-Sniffer's un-redacted file.}"
"{Does he know of your actions?}"
"{What do you think?}"
Hnrahnan's nose twitched, and her posture relaxed as she silently took in information from the Captain's scent, her posture, every micro-expression on Rgrarshok's face. Finally Hnranan nodded an ear. "{He knows. And he's okay with that, for some reason...why? He held a secret of his own? Ah yes, that's it.}"
Rgrarshok bared her teeth. "{Enough of your [parlor tricks]. If you must know, he was reactivated by [Martin] before he joined our crew.}"
The Veridicator dropped her arms to her sides, and now she was very much not smiling. "{Your reports mentioned nothing about that.}"
"{Because it was a purely internal affair regarding to my pack. He was forced into it by [Martin], in the same manner as that [bastard] did to our prisoners. Little-Sniffer was not sent to steal secrets or cause trouble, his only task was to find out why tiny-chompers are in such demand.}"
Hnrahnan snorted. "{You told him that too, I suppose?}"
The Captain kept her face placid. She knew she had to admit to the small infractions to conceal her much larger ones. "{I did. We arranged a deal with [Martin]. He released Little-Sniffer from his obligations, and in exchange I agreed to keep Little-Sniffer's mission a secret.}"
"{Because otherwise you'd reveal [Martin's] treachery. I see. I can't say I'd have done the same thing.}"
Rgrarshok leaned forward, nearly touching her nose to Hnrahnan's face. "{Oh, I know exactly what the much-vaunted Inquisition would do. You'd officially interrogate Little-Sniffer, bring everything out in the open, arrest everyone, punish the guilty to the fullest extent possible.}"
The Veridicator's eyes widened. "{I-}"
"{Shut up. You want the truth? Here it is. You would have sent Little-Sniffer home in disgrace. You would have advertised the mendacity of certain tiny-chompers and weakened their species' position in the Senate. You would have torn it all down, destroyed everything in the name of your holy crusade to expose wrongdoing.}"
Rgrarshok leaned back as she continued. "{You would have robbed this crew of a superb pack-mate and ally. Little-Sniffer has proven himself time and again. I trust him with my life, as do we all.}"
Hnrananh's teeth ground together, a soft but deadly sussuration that resounded throughout the bridge. "{You always were too optimistic, Rgrarshok. Why'd you ever join the Inquisition in the first place?}"
"{Because I foolishly thought it was the best way to serve the Throne-at-The-Center-of-All-Things.}" Without waiting for a reply, Rgrarshok spun on her heel and marched out of the bridge. She could feel Hnrahnan's eyes boring into her back the entire time.
​
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​
Martin held one arm across his chest, using that arm as a rest for his other elbow and in turn propping up his chin as he regarded the glossy black ovoid in front of him with something akin to lust. The object of his desire sat in a white, sterile-looking cradle surrounded by a bevy of instruments and scanners. The lab around him and his companion was equally pristine, with soft white lighting and a sound-deadening rubbery floor.
"When can we start?" he asked.
His companion, a balding and stoop-shouldered man by the name of Daniel, wrung his hands together. "We have to be very careful, sir. This is the one and only sample we have."
"I know that! But the data in this thing is designed to be readable no matter what. Why is it taking so long?"
The scientist rubbed his forehead. "We know the code phrase to trigger the Egg's display mode. If your intel is accurate-"
"It is."
"-er, well then I should just need to supply the Egg with ordinary raw materials. Silica, mainly, with some organic compounds. That's not the problem."
Martin dropped his hands to his sides and rounded on the scientist. "Then what is the problem?"
Daniel's eyes went wide and he held up his hands to ward off the furious Martin. "First, I need more help. I'm all alone here."
The spymaster nearly snapped at the man to stop sniveling and get on with it. But then he figured that it was a good time to show magnanimity. He placed a hand on the scientist's shoulder and gave his warmest, most sincere smile. "I know, and believe me I appreciate what you've done so far. But this is incredibly secret. I can't just pull people in willy-nilly, I have to vet them thoroughly. Another week or so at most, and I can get you a couple more people. Chaudhari's looking very promising."
The name seemed to give the scientist fresh strength. The harried look in his eyes turned into a gleam of hope. "Really? Well, if you can get her in here then that'll help tremendously. But there's another problem."
Martin rolled his eyes and made a 'get on with it' motion with his free hand.
"It's the translators, sir. You do understand that they're not stand-alone components, yes? Every translator is linked with the others in a non-centralized matrix. It has to be that way, for naming conventions if nothing else. I can't just type in the trigger phrase. By now the xenos will be looking for it. It would be like sending up a signal flare from our location."
Daniel walked away from Martin, causing the latter's comforting hand to drop away from his shoulder. He didn't notice as he started pacing around the Egg's resting place. "And that's just the start. If we get the Egg to 'grow' into its display mode, then any data we pull off of it will be in Jornissian. Can we trust our translators at that point? The xenos will have real-time access to the matrix. It wouldn't take much effort on their part, just some errant mis-translations here and there and the data on the Egg would become useless. We wouldn't know which bits to trust."
By now the scientist's hands were almost white with the force of his wringing. But that wringing slowed as Martin's delighted laugh echoed through the lab.
"Oh, is that all? You should have said that sooner." With a magician's flourish, Martin pulled a data chip out of his coat pocket. He held it out to the scientist, who took it with curious caution.
"What is this, sir?"
"A complete Jornissian-to-human translation matrix. One that you can use without accessing the GalNet."
Daniel stared in awe at the little fleck of plastic and silicon in his palm. This was the Holy Grail for just about any government on Earth one could care to name. "Where...but...sir...how did you get this?"
Martin crossed his arms and smirked. "You know I can't tell you. Let's just say it's a donation from a benefactor who wishes to remain anonymous."
​
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​
Christian Murphy glanced sideways as an unfamiliar woman seated herself on the stool next to him. He resisted the urge to do a double-take; she was way too beautiful to be stuck up in this frozen neck of the woods. He played it cool, however, and waited until the bartender was near before making his move.
"An Old Fashioned, please," said the woman. Her voice was just as gorgeous as the rest of her, smoky but not hoarse or grating.
"Put it on my tab," said Christian smoothly. He smiled and raised his own glass to her.
"My thanks," she replied. "But I don't know if I should accept drinks from strangers."
He waved his free hand in a 'aw shucks' fashion. "I've got no, whaddyacall, agenda here. Just welcoming a newcomer to our sunny paradise." Christian motioned with his glass towards the nearest window. It was pitch-black outside, and the window itself sported a considerable layer of frost.
She smiled at him, her dimples making his heart sing. "So what do you do?"
"I work at the base."
The woman arched an eyebrow playfully. Her drink arrived, and she accepted it with a graceful nod towards the bartender. "That sounds exciting. Do you get to play with weapons?"
Christian knew this broad was way too sophisticated to fall for any horseshit. No, for her he had to downplay it and act all self-deprecating. "Nah, nothing like that. Mostly it's just watching TV screens while my butt goes numb."
"Aw, too bad."
"What about you? What's a dazzling urbanite like you doing in a place like this?"
She gave him a sly look from under her eyelashes as she traced one delicate finger around the rim of her glass. Something about the motion made it seem as if she'd like to do the same to his lips. "I'm afraid that I am affected with wanderlust. Normally I have a more substantial nest egg to assist me, but it's become a little depleted. I'd like to replenish it. I have some moderate skill at games of chance, do you know if there are any local games that are worthwhile?"
Christian's heart-rate increased. This woman was not only a stone-cold stunner but also a gambler? He tried to assume a casual slouch as he replied. "I might. I'm not too shabby myself when it comes to cards. There's one local game I've been to a couple of times. I know they meet tomorrow, if you're interested. I could go with you."
"Really? I'd like that, but I'm kind of in a bind. I'm almost broke...," she shuddered ever so slightly. "...and, well, I'm worried about such a game going south. If that happened, I'd need someone in my corner who is quite able, both in cards and in dealing out violence."
It had been many years since Christian had done more than his employer's standard small-arms training, but he still felt compelled to respond. "I can help with either of those." He leaned onto the bar and flexed as much as he could. "Don't you worry."
She shot him a panicked look from under her eyelids, as if she was a stag caught in the open by a pack of wolves. "Don't just say that. I really need your help."
"I'm here for you." For the briefest of moments, Christian actually meant it.

First off I'm new to this sub but I've been writing fantasy shorts for a while. I dont know if the Weird West genre gets much love here but I thought I'd give it a go.
Secondly I'd like to thank u/fox_unboxed for posting the prompt that inspired this. I posted there as well but the prompt is a few days old so I figured I'd post it here too and see if it gets any traction.
Constructive criticism is welcomed and encouraged.
Now without any further ado:
The Dealer
Our Lord on High, blessed be your name.
The words drifted across my consciousness like an oar-less canoe down a lazy stream as I labored over yet another form.
I looked around my small cubicle, startled for a moment. My computer blinked at me. The picture of my recently deceased cat, Relay, stood frozen, forever looking as beautiful as he did in life.
I stood and peered over the short wall at Stephen.
"Did you say something?"
He looked up from his own stack of paperwork. "Nah. Except maybe how much I hate reviewing these fucking forms. But I thought I only said it in my head."
"Hmm, I thought I heard someone praying."
"Probably asking why God almighty created paperwork," Stephen laughed. "But alas He hath forsaken us. We are in Hell, and Hell is more paperwork."
I looked over at the other cubicle. Jess was absent today. Something about her kids again. She's the reason we were stuck here, an hour after everyone else had gone home.
I stamped another "APPROVED" on a page I had barely read.
What might we, your humble servants, do to atone for our transgressions?
A man's voice, sadness and anger broiled with touches of reverence and love that left a sickly sweet taste in my mind.
"Is anyone else in the building?"
"Not to my knowledge," Steve didn't even look up from his forms.
"I need some more coffee. Want anything?"
"Nah man, if I drink another cup I'll be awake and pissing all night."
I made my way to the breakroom and filled the coffee maker with water and crushed beans. As the machine turned water into liquid sleep, I pushed open the restroom and stepped in.
It took a second for the automated lights to recognize that someone was in the room and flicker to life. In that brief moment, I felt as though there was someone else in the small bathroom with me.
I did my business and turned the faucet on. While I waited for the water to warm up I stared at my reflection in the mirror.
"You look like shit," I told myself. My reflection only stared back at me sadly, as if to say "so much wasted potential. I'm disappointed in you."
And maybe he was disappointed in me. I sure as hell was. A's and B's in high school with never less than a 90 in an english class and here I was, a college drop out doing temp work for a loan office.
I washed my hands and splashed warm water on my face.
Outside the door I heard the beeping that signified the completion of the coffee makers task.
I poured myself a cup and burnt my tongue trying to drink it before it cooled off. I flinched and spilled half my cup down my white button up shirt.
"God damnit!" I not-quite-shouted.
I rushed back to the restroom to grab a handful of paper towels, suddenly feeling dizzy. I began to furiously wet paper towels and scrub at my shirt, knowing it wouldn't help anything. I would never wear this shirt to work again.
Eventually, defeated, I turned to leave the restroom.
Show me your face, oh lord, so that I may praise you and bed your forgiveness.
I slipped in a puddle of water. On my way down I might have hit my head on the sink, but I can't be sure. Because by that point my entire world had turned to black.
What felt like seconds later I opened my eyes. I felt the weight of a course blanket scraping against my skin.
Great, I thought, I've knocked myself out and now I'm in the hospital.
"Oh good, yer awake," said a familiar voice. I couldn't quite place it but it itched in the back of my mind. "I was beginin' ta think you'd never wake up." The deep southern drawl, tinged with sadness struck a chord deep in my memory but I couldn't quite put my finger on it.
"Where am I? Is Steve here?" I began to sit up.
"Whoa there, fella. Take it easy. you took a pretty nasty fall...though I'm not quite sure from where."
I looked around the room. Not a hospital, but a bedroom. Small, though not uncomfortable. I lay on a twin sized bed with a wooden frame. Next to me was a wooden nightstand with an old fashioned oil lamp and a bible resting atop it.
Across from the bed, next to a wooden door, was a desk that would not have been out of place in an antique museum. A man sat at the desk, wearing priest's clothes that looked straight out of a western.
The man had a scruffy, gray beard and deep blue eyes. His hair was long and scraggly, but combed in a neat side part. His nose was large, and appeared to have been broken a few times. In one hand he held another bible, and the other, held a glass of something that appeared to be whiskey.
"Now, I know just about everyone in this here town, but I don't reckon we've met,” he sat the glass on the table and stood, like a man who’s knees weren’t quite what they used to be. He approached the bed and stuck out a rough, callused hand. “Father Allister Hamby, but most folks around here just call me Father Al. those with any lick of respect anyhow. The others just call me Al.”
“Mike,” I shook his hand. “Most folk just call me Mike.”
“My initial thoughts upon seein’ ya, was that you were gunslinger, or maybe a travelling merchant. But I gotta be honest, yer way too clean to have been on the road, and these hands ain't seen a day’s worth of hard work in their lifetime. So, how’s it you managed to find yourself in my church, Mike?”
“I’d honestly like an answer to that myself. Where am I exactly?”
“This here is the town of Drycreek Run. It's the first major town Once you cross over into the New Mexico Territory.”
The name struck home. Drycreek Run, New Mexico territory. Father Allister Hamby. I wrote about these back in high school. But that would mean…
“Father Al, are you familiar with a man called The Gambler?”
“Oh yeah. Strange fella. Saved our town once a few years back. Used card magic. He had a neat trick with the king of clubs, pulled a sword right out of the card.”
“You should see what he does with aces.” I said dryly.
"Wait a minute. If you know The Gambler does'at mean yer a dealer too?" Father Al asked.
"No. Until very recently I didn't know they even existed."
"Have you been living under a rock, son? Dealers is all over the place. Even a city slicker from the east coast would have at least seen a low level dealer doing card tricks in a saloon."
"I'm…" I hesitated, "not from around here."
"A foreigner. That would explain the funny clothes. And yer accent is a little odd. But yer English is damn near perfect. Must have learnt it as a babe."
"Something like that." I said.
"Well, you've been out cold for a few hours. I s'pose I better fetch the doc to give you a once over. Feel free to look around. Not much worth stealin anymore so I ain't worried about ya runnin off with my tithes. Only real thing of value is a bottle of whiskey in this drawer," He kicked the bottom left drawer of the desk. "Help yourself to it, just leave me enough to wet my mouth before bed. There's a well out back, it takes a few to get the water going and make sure you run it for a minute to get all the crud out before you drink any. I'll be back in a couple hours."
After the priest left, I got out of bed. I found my shirt folded at the foot and put it on. I made my way out back where the well was. It looked just like the one my great grandma had in her yard. As well it should, I used it as inspiration.
I gave it a few pumps, until the water came gushing out. It came out black as ink at first, but after a few moments it cleared. Well almost. The water still had a brownish tinted to it. But I washed my face and had a few sips. Then I went back inside to the bedroom. I grabbed the bottle of whiskey and poured myself a glass. It was strong stuff. After all, Allister had a taste for the kinda whiskey that burns your nose hairs.
Next to the bottle I found a deck of cards. The Gambler had given them to him as a parting gift. It was Father Al who had really saved the town, though he wouldn't take credit for it. Without him, they never would have figured out the true culprit was a vampire.
I pulled opened the pack and slid the top card out. The king of clubs. The Gambler could use this card to make any melee weapon he wanted. His favorite was a short sword. But he had also used it to make scimitars, bastard swords and zweihanders. He had even made a club once to beat off a group of would-be rapists harassing a barmaid.
I made my way into the main portion of the building, a low-ceiling chapel with 8 rows of pews. The podium where Allister would preach his sermons was falling apart, and the pews were little more than fire wood scraps. The father took pride in his church. He would never let it fall into such a state of disrepair. Unless he was struggling financially.
I fingered the deck of cards in my pocket, only now realizing that I had taken them. I pulled them out and found the king of clubs.
This was my world. I should be able to work it like clay and make it whole again.
How did The Gambler do it again?
I closed my eyes and imagined myself swimming in an empty void. There was only me and the card.
I imagined the king handing me a sword.
I grasped the hilt and just like The Gambler did so many times I willed the sword into reality.
The front door of the church opened.
"Our lord on high," said Allister.
"You didn't tell me he was a dealer," said Doc McCannan.

Top Edit - I'm removing the segment about Titan skating. I had initially included it as a preamble to the changes to Agility, but discuss of it has completely taken over the comments, when this post was supposed to be about weapon balance. You can see exactly what I initially wrote in the comment by Sliq111 below. When I make my subclass balance posts, I will include it there and we can have this debate again. Thanks!
Massive Breakdown Podcast Episode 27: Meta Stats and Proposed Weapon Balance Changes
For those who just want to see my proposed changes, and not the reasoning behind them, there is a TL;DR at the bottom.
I've posted a variation of this before the last two balance patches, but unfortunately almost none of my suggestions were implemented. As such, we've been stuck in the same stale meta for the better part of a year. Please keep in mind that this post is made with simplicity in mind. I'm looking at small, simple changes that could improve the game, as opposed to large, sweeping ones that might legitimately shift the way things function. Bungie has a history of overreacting when they do balance patches, and I'd like to avoid that here. Starting small, evaluating how it goes, and then tweaking should be the name of the game, not buffing weapons to be god-almighty powerful and then nerfing them into the ground cough cough mid-impact pulse rifles.
Now, when I look at what I would like to see from a balance patch, it's important to keep an eye on the big picture. As Bungie has said before, perfect balance for a game like Destiny does not mean every gun is equal, but instead that every gun has a role. For a good example of this, let's take a quick look at the scout rifle class, and its distinctive arhcetypes:

1. High-impact (Hand of Judgmet, Cocytus, etc.) - High risk/high reward. Crit shots lead to one of the fastest times-to-kill in the game, but the body shot TtK is among the slowest. Rewarding of precision, but incredibly punishing of inaccuracy. It's role is a marksman's weapon.
2. Mid-impact (Hung Jury, DIS-43, etc.) - Low risk/low reward. One of the easiest guns to use in the game. Only requires two shots out of four to be crits in order to achieve optimal TtK, but said TtK is very slow (1.00s) and thus is outside of the competitive meta. An easy and forgiving weapon, perfect for beginners, but outclassed at higher levels. It's role is a beginnenon-competitive gun.
3. Low-impact and very low-impact (MIDA, Angel's Advocate, DIS-47, The Inward Lamp, etc.) - Medium risk/medium reward. Faster rates of fire are more forgiving of missed shots than the high impact models, but a higher percentage of critical hits is needed to achieve optimal TtK than the middle impact scouts. These archetypes sit between the high and low-impact archetypes in both TtK and difficulty of use, forming a solid middle ground. The risk/reward isn't as high as the Cocytus, nor is it as low as the Hung Jury. Their role is that of the in-between guns, better than the beginner but not as good as the marksman version.

Scout rifles are a good example of how a weapon class should be balanced internally (meaning how the archetypes relate to one another), and I believe it is Bungie's biggest success in their PvP sandbox. Every sub-class has a purpose, and they fulfill their purposes well. In the upcoming Balance Patch, I'd be very happy if SRs were left mostly untouched, with the exception two universal changes to weapons that need to be made.

1. The first is that the most recent flinch changes, which universally increased the initial flinch taken when being shot, need to be removed. This reaction was complete overkill, and given that most of the complaints were being lodged at sniper rifles, it was unnecessary to implement this change across the board. In addition to this, the flinch changes have made sniping incredibly difficult, so much so that the most popular sniper is now the NLB, which doesn't suffer from flinch the same way its scoped brethren do. Gunfights had enough flinch to deal with prior to this patch, so I think the initial flinch taken should be scaled back to pre-patch levels. The increased flinch direction on snipers can be kept, it's just the initial flinch amount which should be changed.
2. Second, and predicated on the above problem being fixed, I would add the ability to deal more flinch to all of the high-impact archetypes. While I disagree that all weapons should effectively do more flinch against each other, which is what the previous patch made happen, I do think it's a problem that low-impact weapons cause more flinch than high-impact ones. Right now, the issue with the system is that it's based more on number of bullets hitting than on the actual impact stats. As such, high RoF weapons deal immensely more flinch, even though their impact is much lower. The most recent patch, instead of addressing this, made it so that all weapons dealt more flinch, which still kept the problem of low-impact archetypes dealing the most. A weapon like Clever Dragon, that has an impact of 4, should not be able to out flinch the Chaos Dogma with an impact of 61. but here we are. Currently, this happens because each shot adds a percentage of maximum flinch, starting at 50% and going up to 100% with each consecutive shot. So it's not unreasonable to think that the Clever Dragon could achieve 100% flinch within two thirds of a second or less, and then stay there for the duration of any gun fight. The rapid RoF means that there is no time for the reticle to reset, and it makes it very difficult to fight against. The Chaos Dogma, on the other hand can only fire 3 shots in four fifths of a second, with a lot of time for the reticle to reset in between. So even if the 100% flinch level is higher than the Clever Dragon's, it takes longer to get there and there is more time for it to decrease mid-battle. This needs to be addressed, so I would lower the maximum flinch of low impact weapons, while drastically raising the maximum flinch for high impact archetypes. Doing so would still allow low impact weapons to hit 100% flinch more quickly, but it would be noticeably less than the slower firing weapons maximum, and comparable to their partial flinch as they work up to maximum.

Although I'm not going to get into specific universal sandbox balance suggestions in this article, I would also like to point out that a change that need to be made:

1. Agility needs to have a far great effect than it does now. Similar to how Recovery used to do almost nothing, and they made the difference between high and low greater, the same needs to be done with Agility. Right now there is almost no drawback for running minimum, and no benefit to running max, hence everyone simply ignores it. This needs to change. There should be some trade-off for choosing to go with max Armor or Recovery.

The last universal change I'd like to make has to do with map selection. Currently, the only maps that are large enough to favor multiple playstyles are relegated to the Combined Arms playlist. I'd like to see these maps introduced back into Control, with an extra capture point midway between each team's base and B. This would bring the total capture points up to 5, and would benefit the scoring system accordingly. Games would move faster, which has long been a complaint about the big maps, and long distance weapons would have a chance to shine, which they are not afforded with the current map selections.
With that out of the way, let's get back to the specific weapon classes with one that is not well balanced, the auto rifles. My suggestions for ARs have not changed from the last balance patch.

1. High-impact (An Answering Chord, Antipodal Hindsight, etc.) - I'd like to see this archetype become high risk/high reward, as opposed to what it currently is, which is high risk/no reward. With the slowest optimal TtK of all AR archetypes, the high-impact models currently serve no purpose. Using one of these weapons offers no benefits, as the damage drop off is still severe enough to limit their useful engagement distances to close range, and they don't even do enough damage to make them kill quickly within that optimal area. High-impact ARs need some work done. My suggestion would be to increase the precision and body shot damage by 5%, and push the start of damage drop off out to pre-patch 2.0 levels. Instead of doing 26/21 from crit/body shots, the gun would now do 28/22. This would keep the optimal time-to-kill of 0.93s the same against 200hp (10 armor) Guardians, but would allow the weapon to kill Guardians with mid-armor (7) or lower in 0.80s. High-impact ARs would also be competitive out to closer medium ranges, giving them a chance against low-impact PRs. As mentioned before, I would also increase the amount of flinch done by this archetype, to both help with countering high-zoom weapons being used at closer distances, and to offset the inherent drawback of needing to maintain line of sight for extended periods of time while engaging a target. It's role would be a weapon that is very useful against mid to low armor targets, and functions as high risk/high reward based on your opponents build.
2. Mid-Impact (Paleocontact, Righteous, etc.) - Medium risk/medium reward. Another weapon that suffers from aggressive damage falloff handicapping its usefulness, mid-impact ARs could also use a touch of help. While they have a slightly faster optimal TtK (0.90s) than the high-impact models, their base damage is right on the cusp, and as soon as damage fall off is initiated, they lose the ability to kill 200hp Guardians in 10 crit shots, which prevents them from being competitive. I would again add a 5% damage boost, bringing the damage from 20/16 to 21/17, and push the damage fall off out to pre-2.0 values. This will allow the weapon to maintain its optimal TtK longer, and also allow it to compete with high-impact ARs and very-low impact PRs at longer short ranges. Overall TtK would not change. This role would be the jack-of-all trades weapons. Better optimal TtK against high armor targets than the high-impact models, but slower TtK against low armor ones. You can choose between using this gun for the guaranteed optimal TtK kill in 0.90s, or the possibility of killing faster, at the risk of killing slower, if you use the high impact archetype.
3. Low-Impact (Doctrine of Passing, Arminius, etc.) - Low risk/high reward in some cases, high risk/low reward in others. With the fastest body TtK of any legendary primary weapon in game, low-impact ARs don't require much precision to take advantage of their benefits. Although these guns are low risk/high reward within their optimal engagement distances, they do have the drawback of being near useless outside of medium close range, due to damage fall off. I would again increase base damage by 5%, bringing us from 15/12 back to 16/13, but I would maintain the damage fall off ranges currently in effect. This would drop the optimal TtK from 0.87s to 0.80s, and the body shot TtK from 1.07s to 1.00s, which would provide an excellent counter to aggressive shotgun play with weapons like Universal Remote. The damage fall off would still be quick and noticeable, which would keep these weapons from being effective outside of medium short range. Skilled players would be able to outclass these weapons by landing consistent headshots, as the optimal TtK for this class is almost impossible to achieve, and thus most players rely on a combination of crit and body shots, and the flinch of those impacts forcing other players to miss. These guns would have the role of shotgun stoppers, high reward for using them in their optimal engagement areas, but high risk and nearly useless outside of them.

Now that we're done with auto rifles, let's move on to hand cannons. My suggestions for high impact HCs haven't changed, but I've revised my statements on the mid impact models.

1. High-impact (Judith-D, Ill Will, etc.) - Needs to become high risk/higher reward. This class of hand cannon is criminally underrepresented in year two, but the truth is you're not missing out on much. Although they are supposed to give you the ability to kill low-armor Guardians (3 armor or less) in a blazingly fast 0.50s with two critical hits, it's becoming more and more rare to see people running any combination that gives them that low of armor. What you're left with is a gun that requires a full 1.00s to get a kill on the vast majority of Guardians, and thus is generally left behind. I would increase the damage by 1%, which would bring it from 95/64 to 96/64 (due to decimals, the body shot damage would not round up). This would allow them to kill Guardians with 5 armor or lower in two crit shots, without affecting their optimal TtK against higher armor Guardians, thus resulting in a proper high risk/high reward mechanic. The role is a gambler's weapon, high reward if your opponent is low armor, but high risk if they aren't.

Next up would be a change that would affect all hand cannon archetypes, but I want to clarify that in this case, these changes would not affect Thorn and TLW. They are both unique among HCs, and as such I think need to be looked at separately. I would like to undo the range nerf that Thorn received last patch, but other than that I would not touch these weapons at the current time. While TLW and Thorn without the range nerf are formidable weapons, perhaps too good in the current state, they would be less so when compared to the overall increased potency of primary weapons this balance patch would bring. That being said, let's move on.

1. Remove the accuracy bloom that was brought in with patch 1.1.1. Completely and totally, this should be gone. Nobody likes RNG, especially when it comes to where your bullets will hit, and Bungie should have learned this lesson during Halo Reach's DMR bloom debacle. The accuracy issues came about because of people sniping with TLW and Thorn, both of which were unique cases, and should have been treated as such. Other HCs have suffered for long enough.
2. In order to prevent them from once again taking over the long range primary meta, aim assist would be blanket reduced across all hand cannon archetypes. The exact number could be up for debate, but a general decrease of 15% or more would play into the hand cannon ideal of rewarding an accurate and skilled hand.
3. Reduce the in-air accuracy back to pre-buff levels. One of the strongest points of hand cannons is their ability to play mid-air, which almost all other weapons lack. There are two schools of thought on this: Some people want all guns to be accurate in the air, others want none of them. I lean towards the second camp, because making all guns accurate in the air would fundamentally alter the way the game is played. The reason I would remove in air accuracy from HCs is because I don't think Bungie wanted their PvP aspect to be played with a heavy airborne component, but that's all we see from high level play now. It eliminates the ability to use other weapons because you're forced to stay ground while someone using a Hand Cannon isn't. Either all weapons should be accurate in the air so there can be other choices in high level play, or none of them should be. For simplicity's sake, in this patch we'll take the ability away from Hand Cannons. This will probably be the most unpopular point in the patch.

Mid-impact and low-impact HCs are actually relatively balanced right now, if you focus on things other than the awful accuracy problems. Mid-impacts have a slower time-to-kill, but it's easier to achieve it, needing only 1 crit and 2 body shots. Low-impacts have a faster TtK, but they require 2 crit and 1 body shot. I like this trade off, and if Bungie could make it so that range wasn't the only stat anyone every cared about on hand cannons, I think we'd see a lot more variety in their usage.
Let's move on now to pulse rifles, which is the weapon class that I think needs the most work. My ideas to buff mid and high impact PRs have stayed unchanged, but I've added some appropriate modifications to the very-low impact class.

1. High-impact (Lyudmila-D, Spare Change, etc.) - Currently very high risk/high reward. That risk needs to be brought down a bit. While in theory the very fast time-to-kill is a decent trade off for the slow RoF, the fact of the matter is the risk is far too high to be worth the reward. These weapons either require all headshots from both bursts (Spare Change) or all headshots and one body shot (Lyudmila) in order to get their optimal times-to-kill. In practice, this is very, very difficult to do. So much so, in fact, that almost no one uses these weapons at all. A 4% buff to damage across the board would bring Spare Change up from 34/23 to 36/24, making it kill in five crit and one body shot as opposed to six crits, which would not affect the optimal TtK of 0.73s. Lyudmila would move from 26/18 to 28/19, which would not affect the optimal TtK of 0.80s, but would make it require only six critical hits and two body shot, as opposed to the seven and one needed currently. These modifications alone would not be enough to drastically change the usefulness of these weapons, but I would pair it with increased flinch, which they deserve to have as high impact pulse rifles. A slightly larger buff could be issued, as I originally toyed with a 9% increase, but I feel like weapons that can kill in only two bursts need to be heavily monitored, and they should stick to rewarding highly accurate marksman working within the given optimal ranges. Making the Spare Change kill in four crit and two body, or the Lyudmila kill in five crit and three body, could have the highly adverse effect of making these weapons too easy to use in general, although it would be something I would consider after seeing how the community reacts to these smaller buffs. If they were to be implemented, it would have to be with the condition that any new guns added to this archetype maintain the erratic recoil patterns of the current models, guaranteeing a certain level of difficulty in hitting the required shots from each burst. The role is a marksman's weapon, rewards high accuracy but punishes missed shots.
2. Mid-impact (Nirwen's Mercy, The Villiany, etc.) - Currently high risk/no reward. Needs to become high risk/high reward. Among the most useless of guns in PvP, their horrendous optimal TtK of 1.00s with seven critical hits leaves them out of almost every loadout. Currently doing a paltry 30/20, I would issue an 11% damage buff, pushing them up to 32/21. This would allow them to kill Guardians with armor less than 5 in two perfect bursts (6 crits), for a rapid TtK 0.63s, but a very slow optimal TtK on full armor Guardians of 1.00s. This would make it a truly high risk/high reward weapon archetype, again based on opponents armor.
3. Low-impact (Hawksaw, PDX-45, etc.) - Medium risk/medium reward. Once the kings of the Crucible, I'd still like to see them get a small damage buff, paired with slightly more aggressive damage fall off. The damage buff makes it so that they can stay competitive with the improved meta with ARs now having better range and high-impact PRs being easier to use, while the damage fall off increase will prevent them from being too competitive outside of their intended ranges. 4% should do nicely in terms of damage, bringing them from 25/17 to 27/18. This will actually keep the optimal TtK the same, but take it from needing eight crits to needing seven crits and a body shot, while making them more effective against Guardians above 10 armor. This weapon's role would be it's usefulness against high armor targets, and it's relative ease of use compared to the higher impact archetypes in the middle ranges. It wouldn't kill as fast in best case scenarios, but then again it shouldn't.
4. Very low-impact (Grasp of Malok, etc.) - Medium risk/medium reward. These weapons are the biggest problem in terms of primary weapons in the current state of the Crucible. Let's look at what it is that makes them powerful: Fast optimal time-to-kill, very forgiving of a missed shot, great range, causes very high flinch. Now, two of those things make sense for the archetype, being the fast TtK and forgiving of missed shots. Great range and high flinch do not make sense. We've already addressed the flinch in a universal change above, so I would focus mostly on range. A drastic reduction in base range would work, but I think the better idea is the implementation of the aggressive damage fall off that was added to ARs and HCs recently. This would immediately make it more difficult to use these weapons at ranges that should be the domain of higher impact pulses and scouts, while not effecting them at their optimal distances. To guard against these weapons becoming immediately useless, a 1% buff to damage will keep it in line and move it from 23/16 to 24/16. There would be no changes to either optimal or body-shot TtK, but it would serve better against targets over 10 armor in close range. This weapon's role would be shared with the above impact archetype, but with a faster TtK at shorter range. More forgiving, less rewarding, but useful against high armor targets.

Pulse rifles would be quite strong overall in this meta, with the higher-impact models having the possibility of faster times-to-kill, while being less forgiving of missing shots. The lower-impact archetypes would have slower optimal times-to-kill, but would be more forgiving of missed shots. Some models would be better against high armor, some would excel against low armor. Both of these groups would be competing with improved ARs and HCs, while SRs will maintain their position as useful weapons at longer ranges. Now that we're done with the primary weapons overall, you can see that although the majority of changes didn't result in drastic TtK differences, most of the weapons will perform noticeably better, both against each other and against special weapons. Speaking of special weapons, my recommendations for them are simple.

1. Sniper Rifles and Shotguns - Make inventory more directly tied to impact. Higher-impact models should have significantly lower inventory than lower-impact ones. An example could be a 1000-Yard Stare only getting 3-4 rounds per special ammo brick (dependent upon weapon and armor perks) while Glass Promontory gets 5-6. Same with a Party Crasher vs. a Burden of Proof. This is already partially in game, but it's inconsistent and not described well to the players, until they test the guns for themselves. There needs to be some incentive to run shotguns and snipers that aren't just high-impact, but these classes do not need to be nerfed again.
2. With the recent changes to flinch revoked, snipers would once again become powerful. To prohibit them from taking over the meta, I'd like to tone down the aim assist. I'm not sure what a perfect number would be, but something in the ballpark of 20% would probably work. Snipers need to reward accuracy above all else, and they're simply too forgiving in the current state. Again, it can be scaled so that high-impact/high-AA snipers like LDR and 1000YS can be hit a little harder, as a method of pushing people towards other options in the Crucible.
3. Make the difference in range between low impact and high impact shotguns smaller. It's okay if you want high impact shotguns to kill at the farthest distances, but right now low impact models lag so far behind that it's laughable. The trade-off of a faster RoF just isn't worth losing so much of your one-hit kill potential. Bring low impact shotguns base range up, so that you lose out on a smaller amount of kill-distance, on order to make players feel that it's actually worth it to increase the RoF. In conjunction with this, Matador 64 and Party Crasher need to have their base range taken down, from 23 to 17, so that they can no longer hit max range with Aggressive Ballistics.

Heavy weapons would be left alone in this balance patch, I think they're in a good place.
We have to understand that a patch like this doesn't aim to completely destroy the meta, like previous ones have. We're in a good place overall, with multiple classes being represented, and a few completely dominant weapons. Now is the time to tweak things, no reinvent. This article has just been an episode in hypothetical possibilities, but I hope you enjoyed reading it, and that it provoked some thought. I'm 100% positive that many people will disagree, which is reasonable, so I'd like to hear your arguments as well. Thanks for reading!
TL;DR of the Proposed Changes -

1. Remove the recent changes to initial flinch. They've made primary gun battles a pain, and sniping impossible. The change to sniper flinch direction can remain.
2. With that being said, high-impact archetypes do deserve to have the ability to deal increased flinch. High-impact weapons specifically need a buff so that they can deal more flinch than low-impact ones. This would be accomplished by decreasing the maximum flinch of low impact weapons while increasing the maximum flinch of high impact weapons. While low impact archetypes would be able to hit 100% flinch more quickly, it would be noticeably less than the high impacts' maximum, and comparable during their slower climb to 100%.
3. Agility provides a much larger benefit at the highest levels, and there is a greater penalty for using minimum Agility. This will incentivize people to make choices other than maximum Armor and Recovery.
4. 5% damage boost to all ARs. High-impact goes from 26/21 with TtK of 0.93s, to 28/22 with a possibility to kill Guardians under 7 armor in 0.80s, and a full armor TtK that remains 0.93s. As mentioned, they are given the ability to deal increased flinch. Mid-impact goes from 20/16 to 21/17, TtK stays the same. Both archetypes have the damage fall off pushed back to pre-2.0 levels, to allow them more competitive space. Low-impact goes from 15/12 to 16/13, bringing optimal TtK down from 0.87s to 0.80s, and body shot TtK down from 1.07s to 1.00s. Damage fall off remains as is. This allows the low-impact archetype to be an effective counter to shotgun rushing, without making it too powerful outside of its given range.
5. 1% damage boost to high-impact hand cannons. Brings them up from 95/64 with the possibility to two-shot Guardians with 3 armor or less, to 96/64 with the possibility to two-shot Guardians with 5 armor or less.
6. Reset the accuracy bloom effect on all HCs to pre-1.1.1 levels.
7. Thorn is given back the range that was taken away with the last nerf.
8. Reduce HC aim assist across the board by 15% or more to reduce ability to engage at long distances without precise aim.
9. Remove the in-air accuracy buff that HCs received. Either all weapons should be accurate in air, or none should. Leaving only one class accurate while jumping eliminates choice in high level gameplay. Alternatively, I would also be fine with all weapons being accurate in-air, but this would drastically alter the way Destiny is played.
10. 4% damage boost to high-impact pulse rifles. Takes Spare Change from 34/23 with six crits needed to kill to 36/24 with five crits and one body needed to kill. TtK remains the same. Lyudmila-D goes from 26/18 and seven crit one body to 28/19 and six crit two body. TtK remains the same. High-impact archetype receives ability to deal increased flinch.
11. 11% damage boost to mid-impact pulse rifles. The archetype goes from 30/20 with 6 crits and 1 body needed for a 1.00 optimal TtK, to 32/21. This allows them to kill Guardians with less than 5 armor in 0.63s with six crits, while maintaining the normal 1.00s TtK, with a slightly more forgiving 5 crit and 2 body shots needed, for full armor Guardians.
12. 4% damage buff to low-impact pulse rifles, coupled with slightly more aggressive damage fall off. Leaves TtK unchanged, but brings damage from 25/17 to 27/18, and requires seven crit and one body instead of eight crit. Weapons would be more effective against Guardians over 10 armor in middle ranges.
13. For very-low impact PRs like Clever Dragon, aggressive damage fall-off is added, similar to that which is currently on ARs and HCs. No longer would they be able to compete at scout and sniper distances while still dealing full damage. 1% damage buff is given to prevent them from becoming unusable. Leaves TtK unchanged, but brings damage from 23/16 to 24/16. No changes to either optimal or body shot TtK, but would be more effective against Guardians with armor over 10 in close range.
14. Tie the inventory stat to the impact stat for special weapons like snipers and shotguns. Higher impact specials should consistently get significantly less ammo than their low-impact counterparts, and it should be advertised as such in game to promote greater variety in special weapon choices.
15. Thanks to the removed flinch mechanic, we need to make sure snipers don't become over used again. To do this, we'll decrease base sniper aim assist by 20%. They should reward accuracy, not near misses. This could be scaled so that more popular weapons like 1000YS and LDR are hit slightly harder than the less used guns.
16. Make the difference between low and high impact shotguns' ranges less. Right now the trade-off of a faster RoF for less range isn't worth it, which is why no one uses them. If you increase the base range of low-impact shotguns slightly, pushing them closer to the cap, more people will see them as a viable option. Losing a small amount of kill distance to gain faster RoF is a good tradeoff, losing almost all your kill distance for it is not.
17. Matador 64 and Party Crasher +1 need to have their base ranges dropped from 23 to 17. They should no longer be able to hit the range cap while using Aggressive Ballistics.
18. Leave heavy alone.
19. Bring back the larger maps for Control, and add 1 more point between each team's spawn and B. This will enable the scores to progress more quickly, and will allow longer ranged primaries a place where they will be the most useful.

Massive Breakdown Podcast Episode 17: Proposed Primary Weapon Changes, and Special Weapon Usage Stats
Iron Banner Weapons Breakdown
For those who just want to see my proposed changes, and not the reasoning behind them, there is a TL;DR at the bottom.
Before you read this, note that in my suggestions I do buff the Grasp and Hawksaw archetypes by a very small amount. This is not needed in the current meta, but if all my changes were implemented it would be. It does not change their times-to-kill, but instead helps to give them a specific role in the pulse rifle class, and allows them to continue to compete against other classes of weapons which would be much improved. Read on for more information.
I posted this before the last balance batch, but unfortunately almost none of my suggestions were implemented. Now that Cozmo23 has come back and asked for feedback on primary weapon changes, I figured I could revisit it. Please keep in mind that this post is made with simplicity in mind. I'm looking at small, simple changes that could improve the game, as opposed to large, sweeping ones that might legitimately shift the way things function. Bungie has a history of overreacting when they do balance patches, and I'd like to avoid that here. Starting small, evaluating how it goes, and then tweaking should be the name of the game, not buffing weapons to be god-almighty powerful and then nerfing them into the ground cough cough mid-impact pulse rifles.
Now, when I look at what I would like to see from a balance patch, it's important to keep an eye on the big picture. As Bungie has said before, perfect balance for a game like Destiny does not mean every gun is equal, but instead that every gun has a role. For a good example of this, let's take a quick look at the scout rifle class, and its distinctive arhcetypes:

1. High-impact (Hand of Judgmet, Cocytus, etc.) - High risk/high reward. Crit shots lead to one of the fastest times-to-kill in the game, but the body shot TtK is among the slowest. Rewarding of precision, but incredibly punishing of inaccuracy. It's role is a marksman's weapon.
2. Mid-impact (Hung Jury, DIS-43, etc.) - Low risk/low reward. One of the easiest guns to use in the game. Only requires two shots out of four to be crits in order to achieve optimal TtK, but said TtK is very slow (1.00s) and thus is outside of the competitive meta. An easy and forgiving weapon, perfect for beginners, but outclassed at higher levels. It's role is a beginnenon-competitive gun.
3. Low-impact and very low-impact (MIDA, Angel's Advocate, DIS-47, The Inward Lamp, etc.) - Medium risk/medium reward. Faster rates of fire are more forgiving of missed shots than the high impact models, but a higher percentage of critical hits is needed to achieve optimal TtK than the middle impact scouts. These archetypes sit between the high and low-impact archetypes in both TtK and difficulty of use, forming a solid middle ground. The risk/reward isn't as high as the Cocytus, nor is it as low as the Hung Jury. Their role is that of the in-between guns, better than the beginner but not as good as the marksman version.

Scout rifles are a good example of how a weapon class should be balanced internally (meaning how the archetypes relate to one another), and I believe it is Bungie's biggest success in their PvP sandbox. Every sub-class has a purpose, and they fulfill their purposes well. In the upcoming Balance Patch, I'd be very happy if SRs were left mostly untouched, with the exception two universal changes to primary weapons that need to be made.

1. The first is that the recent flinch changes, which universally increased the initial flinch taken when being shot, need to be negated when holding a primary weapon. Given that most of the complaints were being lodged at sniper rifles, I feel that it was unnecessary to implement this change across the board. Primary vs. primary gunfights had enough flinch to deal with prior to this patch, so I think the initial flinch taken when holding a primary weapon should be scaled back to pre-patch levels.
2. Second, and predicated on the above problem being fixed, I would add the ability to deal more flinch to all of the high-impact archetypes. While I disagree that all primary weapons should effectively do more flinch against each other, which is what the previous patch made happen, I do think it's a problem that low-impact weapons cause more flinch than high-impact ones. Right now, the issue with the system is that it's based more on number of bullets hitting than on the actual impact stats. As such, high RoF weapons deal immensely more flinch, even though their impact is much lower. The most recent patch, instead of addressing this, made it so that all weapons dealt more flinch, which still kept the problem of low-impact archetypes dealing the most. What they should have done was kept flinch where it was for low-impact weapons, and just added the ability to deal increased flinch to high-impact weapons, which could have solved the problem.

With that out of the way, let's get back to the specific weapon classes with one that is not well balanced, the auto rifles.

1. High-impact (An Answering Chord, Antipodal Hindsight, etc.) - I'd like to see this archetype become high risk/high reward, as opposed to what it currently is, which is high risk/no reward. With the slowest optimal TtK of all AR archetypes, the high-impact models currently serve no purpose. Using one of these weapons offers no benefits, as the damage drop off is still severe enough to limit their useful engagement distances to close range, and they don't even do enough damage to make them kill quickly within that optimal area. High-impact ARs need some work done. My suggestion would be to increase the precision and body shot damage by 5%, and push the start of damage drop off out to pre-patch 2.0 levels. Instead of doing 26/21 from crit/body shots, the gun would now do 28/22. This would keep the optimal time-to-kill of 0.93s the same against 200hp (10 armor) Guardians, but would allow the weapon to kill Guardians with mid-armor (7) or lower in 0.80s. High-impact ARs would also be competitive out to closer medium ranges, giving them a chance against low-impact PRs. As mentioned before, I would also increase the amount of flinch done by this archetype, to both help with countering high-zoom weapons being used at closer distances, and to offset the inherent drawback of needing to maintain line of sight for extended periods of time while engaging a target. It's role would be a weapon that is very useful against mid to low armor targets, and functions as high risk/high reward based on your opponents build.
2. Mid-Impact (Paleocontact, Righteous, etc.) - Medium risk/medium reward. Another weapon that suffers from aggressive damage falloff handicapping its usefulness, mid-impact ARs could also use a touch of help. While they have a slightly faster optimal TtK (0.90s) than the high-impact models, their base damage is right on the cusp, and as soon as damage fall off is initiated, they lose the ability to kill 200hp Guardians in 10 crit shots, which prevents them from being competitive. I would again add a 5% damage boost, bringing the damage from 20/16 to 21/17, and push the damage fall off out to pre-2.0 values. This will allow the weapon to maintain its optimal TtK longer, and also allow it to compete with high-impact ARs and very-low impact PRs at longer short ranges. Overall TtK would not change. This role would be the jack-of-all trades weapons. Better optimal TtK against high armor targets than the high-impact models, but slower TtK against low armor ones. You can choose between using this gun for the guaranteed optimal TtK kill in 0.90s, or the possibility of killing faster, at the risk of killing slower, if you use the high impact archetype.
3. Low-Impact (Doctrine of Passing, Arminius, etc.) - Low risk/high reward in some cases, high risk/low reward in others. With the fastest body TtK of any legendary primary weapon in game, low-impact ARs don't require much precision to take advantage of their benefits. Although these guns are low risk/high reward within their optimal engagement distances, they do have the drawback of being near useless outside of medium close range, due to damage fall off. I would again increase base damage by 5%, bringing us from 15/12 back to 16/13, but I would maintain the damage fall off ranges currently in effect. This would drop the optimal TtK from 0.87s to 0.80s, and the body shot TtK from 1.07s to 1.00s, which would provide an excellent counter to aggressive shotgun play with weapons like Universal Remote. The damage fall off would still be quick and noticeable, which would keep these weapons from being effective outside of medium short range. Skilled players would be able to outclass these weapons by landing consistent headshots, as the optimal TtK for this class is almost impossible to achieve, and thus most players rely on a combination of crit and body shots, and the flinch of those impacts forcing other players to miss. These guns would have the role of shotgun stoppers, high reward for using them in their optimal engagement areas, but high risk and nearly useless outside of them.

Now that we're done with auto rifles, let's move on to hand cannons.

1. High-impact (Judith-D, Ill Will, etc.) - Needs to become high risk/higher reward. This class of hand cannon is criminally underrepresented in year two, but the truth is you're not missing out on much. Although they are supposed to give you the ability to kill low-armor Guardians (3 armor or less) in a blazingly fast 0.50s with two critical hits, it's becoming more and more rare to see people running any combination that gives them that low of armor. What you're left with is a gun that requires a full 1.00s to get a kill on the vast majority of Guardians, and thus is generally left behind. I would increase the damage by 1%, which would bring it from 95/64 to 96/64 (due to decimals, the body shot damage would not round up). This would allow them to kill Guardians with 5 armor or lower in two crit shots, without affecting their optimal TtK against higher armor Guardians, thus resulting in a proper high risk/high reward mechanic. The role is a gambler's weapon, high reward if your opponent is low armor, but high risk if they aren't.

Next up would be a change that would affect all hand cannon archetypes, but I want to clarify that in this case, these changes would not affect Thorn and TLW. They are both unique among HCs, and I actually think they are in relatively good places right now. While still very powerful, they would be less so when compared to the overall increased potency of primary weapons this balance patch would bring. That being said, let's move on.

1. Remove the accuracy bloom that was brought in with patch 1.1.1. Completely and totally, this should be gone. Nobody likes RNG, especially when it comes to where your bullets will hit, and Bungie should have learned this lesson during Halo Reach's DMR bloom debacle. The accuracy issues came about because of people sniping with TLW and Thorn, both of which were unique cases, and should have been treated as such. Other HCs have suffered for long enough.
2. Damage fall off should also be pushed back to pre-nerf levels. It's currently too aggressive, and has bullets landing for fractions of full damage even within the supposed sweet spot for HCs, forcing people to again put all of their eggs in the range-increasing-perks basket.
3. In order to prevent them from once again taking over the long range primary meta, aim assist would be blanket reduced across all hand cannon archetypes. The exact number could be up for debate, but a general decrease of 15% or more would play into the hand cannon ideal of rewarding an accurate and skilled hand.

Mid-impact and low-impact HCs are actually relatively balanced right now, if you focus on things other than the awful accuracy problems. Mid-impacts have a slower time-to-kill, but it's easier to achieve it, needing only 1 crit and 2 body shots. Low-impacts have a faster TtK, but they require 2 crit and 1 body shot. I like this trade off, and if Bungie could make it so that range wasn't the only stat anyone every cared about on hand cannons, I think we'd see a lot more variety in their usage.
Let's move on now to pulse rifles, which is the weapon class that I think needs the most work.

1. High-impact (Lyudmila-D, Spare Change, etc.) - Currently very high risk/high reward. That risk needs to be brought down a bit. While in theory the very fast time-to-kill is a decent trade off for the slow RoF, the fact of the matter is the risk is far too high to be worth the reward. These weapons either require all headshots from both bursts (Spare Change) or all headshots and one body shot (Lyudmila) in order to get their optimal times-to-kill. In practice, this is very, very difficult to do. So much so, in fact, that almost no one uses these weapons at all. A 4% buff to damage across the board would bring Spare Change up from 34/23 to 36/24, making it kill in five crit and one body shot as opposed to six crits, which would not affect the optimal TtK of 0.73s. Lyudmila would move from 26/18 to 28/19, which would not affect the optimal TtK of 0.80s, but would make it require only six critical hits and two body shot, as opposed to the seven and one needed currently. These modifications alone would not be enough to drastically change the usefulness of these weapons, but I would pair it with increased flinch, which they deserve to have as high impact pulse rifles. A slightly larger buff could be issued, as I originally toyed with a 9% increase, but I feel like weapons that can kill in only two bursts need to be heavily monitored, and they should stick to rewarding highly accurate marksman working within the given optimal ranges. Making the Spare Change kill in four crit and two body, or the Lyudmila kill in five crit and three body, could have the highly adverse effect of making these weapons too easy to use in general, although it would be something I would consider after seeing how the community reacts to these smaller buffs. If they were to be implemented, it would have to be with the condition that any new guns added to this archetype maintain the erratic recoil patterns of the current models, guaranteeing a certain level of difficulty in hitting the required shots from each burst. The role is a marksman's weapon, rewards high accuracy but punishes missed shots.
2. Mid-impact (Nirwen's Mercy, The Villiany, etc.) - Currently high risk/no reward. Needs to become high risk/high reward. Among the most useless of guns in PvP, their horrendous optimal TtK of 1.00s with seven critical hits leaves them out of almost every loadout. Currently doing a paltry 30/20, I would issue an 11% damage buff, pushing them up to 32/21. This would allow them to kill Guardians with armor less than 5 in two perfect bursts (6 crits), for a rapid TtK 0.63s, but a very slow optimal TtK on full armor Guardians of 1.00s. This would make it a truly high risk/high reward weapon archetype, again based on opponents armor.
3. Low-impact (Hawksaw, PDX-45, etc.) - Medium risk/medium reward. The kings of the Crucible, I'd still like to see them get a small buff, so they can stay competitive with the improved meta with ARs now having better range and high-impact PRs being easier to use. 4% should do it nicely, bringing them from 25/17 to 27/18. This will actually keep the optimal TtK the same, but take it from needing eight crits to needing seven crits and a body shot, while making them more effective against Guardians above 10 armor. This weapon's role would be it's usefulness against high armor targets, and it's relative ease of use compared to the higher impact archetypes. It wouldn't kill as fast in best case scenarios, but then again it shouldn't.
4. Very low-impact (Grasp of Malok, etc.) - Medium risk/medium reward. Not much needs to be changed here. A 1% buff to damage to keep it in line moves it from 23/16 to 24/16. There would be no changes to either optimal or body-shot TtK, but it would serve better against targets over 10 armor. This weapon's role would be shared with the above impact archetype. More forgiving, less rewarding, but useful against high armor targets.

Pulse rifles would be quite strong overall in this meta, with the higher-impact models having the possibility of faster times-to-kill, while being less forgiving of missing shots. The lower-impact archetypes would have slower optimal times-to-kill, but would be more forgiving of missed shots. Some models would be better against high armor, some would excel against low armor. Both of these groups would be competing with improved ARs and HCs, while SRs will maintain their position as useful weapons at longer ranges. Now that we're done with the primary weapons overall, you can see that although the majority of changes didn't result in drastic TtK differences, most of the weapons will perform noticeably better, both against each other and against special weapons. Speaking of special weapons, my recommendations for them are simple.

1. Sniper Rifles and Shotguns - Make inventory more directly tied to impact. Higher-impact models should have significantly lower inventory than lower-impact ones. An example could be a 1000-Yard Stare only getting 3-4 rounds per special ammo brick (dependent upon weapon and armor perks) while Glass Promontory gets 5-6. Same with a Party Crasher vs. a Burden of Proof. This is already partially in game, but it's inconsistent and not described well to the players, until they test the guns for themselves. There needs to be some incentive to run shotguns and snipers that aren't just high-impact, but these classes do not need to be nerfed again.
2. Take down the aim assist on snipers. I'm not sure what a perfect number would be, but something in the ballpark of 20% would probably work. Snipers need to reward accuracy above all else, and they're simply too forgiving in the current state. Again, it can be scaled so that high-impact/high-AA snipers like LDR and Longbow can be hit a little harder, as a method of pushing people towards other options in the Crucible. This no longer needs to be done, as the most recent patch hit them hard enough with flinch. Personally I would be happy with reverting the flinch changes entirely and replacing that nerf with this one, but that's for another day.
3. Make the difference in range between low impact and high impact shotguns smaller. It's okay if you want high impact shotguns to kill at the farthest distances, but right now low impact models lag so far behind that it's laughable. The trade-off of a faster RoF just isn't worth losing so much of your one-hit kill potential. Bring low impact shotguns base range up, so that you lose out on a smaller amount of kill-distance, on order to make players feel that it's actually worth it to increase the RoF.

Heavy weapons would be left alone in this balance patch, I think they're in a good place.
We have to understand that a patch like this doesn't aim to completely destroy the meta, like previous ones have. We're in a good place overall, with multiple classes being represented, and very few completely dominant weapons. Now is the time to tweak things, no reinvent. This article has just been an episode in hypothetical possibilities, but I hope you enjoyed reading it, and that it provoked some thought. I'm 100% positive that many people will disagree, which is reasonable, so I'd like to hear your arguments as well. Thanks for reading!
TL;DR of the Proposed Changes -

1. When holding a primary weapon, the recent change that increased the amount of initial flinch taken should not be in effect. The complaint was directed only at snipers, and the response should have been too. Making all primaries deal more flinch to each other was an overreaction.
2. With that being said, high-impact archetypes should due deserve to have the ability to deal increased flinch. High-impact weapons specifically need a buff so that they can deal more flinch than low-impact ones.
3. 5% damage boost to all ARs. High-impact goes from 26/21 with TtK of 0.93s, to 28/22 with a possibility to kill Guardians under 7 armor in 0.80s, and a full armor TtK that remains 0.93s. As mention, they are given the ability to deal increased flinch. Mid-impact goes from 20/16 to 21/17, TtK stays the same. Both archetypes have the damage fall off pushed back to pre-2.0 levels, to allow them more competitive space. Low-impact goes from 15/12 to 16/13, bringing optimal TtK down from 0.87s to 0.80s, and body shot TtK down from 1.07s to 1.00s. Damage fall off remains as is. This allows the low-impact archetype to be an effective counter to shotgun rushing, without making it too powerful outside of its given range.
4. 1% damage boost to high-impact hand cannons. Brings them up from 95/64 with the possibility to two-shot Guardians with 3 armor or less, to 96/64 with the possibility to two-shot Guardians with 5 armor or less.
5. Reset the accuracy bloom and damage fall off effects on all HCs to pre-1.1.1 levels.
6. Reduce HC aim assist across the board by 15% or more to reduce ability to engage at long distances without precise aim.
7. 4% damage boost to high-impact pulse rifles. Takes Spare Change from 34/23 with six crits needed to kill to 36/24 with five crits and one body needed to kill. TtK remains the same. Lyudmila-D goes from 26/18 and seven crit one body to 28/19 and six crit two body. TtK remains the same. High-impact archetype receives ability to deal increased flinch.
8. 11% damage boost to mid-impact pulse rifles. The archetype goes from 30/20 with 6 crits and 1 body needed for a 1.00 optimal TtK, to 32/21. This allows them to kill Guardians with less than 5 armor in 0.63s with six crits, while maintaining the normal 1.00s TtK, with a slightly more forgiving 5 crit and 2 body shots needed, for full armor Guardians.
9. 4% damage buff to low-impact pulse rifles. Leaves TtK unchanged, but brings damage from 25/17 to 27/18, and requires seven crit and one body instead of eight crit. Weapons would be more effective against Guardians over 10 armor.
10. 1% damage buff to very low-impact pulse rifles. Leaves TtK unchanged, but brings damage from 23/16 to 24/16. No changes to either optimal or body shot TtK, but would be more effective against Guardians with armor over 10.
11. Tie the inventory stat to the impact stat for special weapons like snipers and shotguns. Higher impact specials should consistently get significantly less ammo than their low-impact counterparts, and it should be advertised as such in game to promote greater variety in special weapon choices.
12. Decrease base sniper aim assist by 20%. They should reward accuracy, not near misses. Again, this isn't needed any longer because snipers were hit hard enough with the last patch, but I would much rather have seen this change than increasing flinch.
13. Make the difference between low and high impact shotguns' ranges less. Right now the trade-off of a faster RoF for less range isn't worth it, which is why no one uses them. If you increase the base range of low-impact shotguns slightly, pushing them closer to the cap, more people will see them as a viable option. Losing a small amount of kill distance to gain faster RoF is a good tradeoff, losing almost all your kill distance for it is not.
14. Leave heavy alone.

Shoutout to u/smoomoo31 for the inspiration for this post.
Welcome to TheDearHunter! If you're new, welcome to the congregation! You have an excellent taste in music, and I'm guessing that you want to learn more about this amazing band. That's why I created this guide - to act as a starting point. If you want to find out more about the story or band, I encourage you to check out other threads and head over to the fansite, Lake and the River. Before we start diving in to the inner-working of the band, I wanted to start with a quick introduction.
The Dear Hunter (TDH) sounds unlike any other band out there. I once saw someone define the band as "Alt Post Prog Rock." Personally, I think The Dear Hunter's music transcends genres, moving between Jazz (The Poison Women), Rock Ballads (Bitter Suite Part III), and even Disco (King of Swords). All of the songs are intricately crafted, with multiple layers of instrumentation. Some songs are so catchy you'll be humming them all day, while others will literally toy with your emotions. In order to give you just a taste of what TDH has to offer, I'll start by giving a brief overview of each album's concept, the fan favorites, and my top 3 songs.
Short History Lesson - The Dear Hunter was originally a side project of The Receiving End of Sirens' (TREOS) member Casey Crescenzo. Casey's creative differences ultimately separated him from TREOS and lead to the formation of The Dear Hunter. The band has gone through multiple roster changes, with Casey at the forefront as the songwriter and lead singer for the band. However, the current lineup has been fairly consistent for the past couple of years. Current members are Casey (Vocals/GuitaKeys), his brother Nick Crescenzo (Percussion), Max Tousseau (Keys/Guitar), Nick Sollecito (Bass), Gavin Castleton (Keys/Backing Vocals) and Rob Parr (Guitar).
Act I: The Lake South, The River North - September, 2006
With just 8 songs, Act I operates as an EP. It is the prologue to the Act story. Although it lacks the maturity and production value of later albums, the style is incredibly indicative of their later work.
The Concept TDH's six acts tell the story of a boy called Hunter, born at the turn of the 19th century who will live a life of pain and meet an untimely death. Act I serves as a prologue to this story. We start with a prophecy of the boy's fate from omniscient Oracles and then kick into high gear with "City Escape". Hunter's mother, Ms. Terri, is a prostitute who flees from the City because she is pregnant with Hunter. She escapes to a small wooded area by the lake and the river (far away from the city). The rest of the album revolves around the boy growing up and establishes his naivety/innocence and his interest in learning more about the city/Ms. Terri. Late in the album we get a small insight to what's happening in the city. A Priest runs a Church by day and a prostitution ring, called The Dime, by night. This is the same prostitution ring that Ms. Terri escaped from in "City Escape". The album ends with an orchestra warming up to dive into the real story in Act II.
The Fan Favorite - City Escape: This song kicked off everything. A frantic pace, driving percussion, and ongoing piano lines make this one a classic. You can literally feel the fight or flight mentality of the song. Fun Fact: Casey's mom is doing backing vocals.
My Favorites -

• The Pimp and The Priest: The sleaze! Oh the sleaze! The trumpet line in the beginning just exudes bad guy. The chorus is so singable. And we get the line, "Sing softly, sing/bring me to the lake" for the first time. This is just one of the many reprises that makes the Acts an intricate, interwoven story.
  
• 1878: There's so much to this beautiful track. It's the longest song on the album, which gives Casey time to really explore different themes. The singer from As Tall As Lions sings on the track. Also dat organ solo is just so hot.
  
• The Inquiry of Ms Terri: I don't see this one brought up a lot, but it's grown on me significantly. The steady drums just drive the entire song. Etheral vocals and guitar lines juxtapose the drums so well. But the last chorus just throws everything out the door and Casey lets loose in an extreme spectacle.
  

Act II: The Meaning of, and All Things Regarding Ms. Leading - May, 2007
This album. Oh this album...it just took everything that Act I did good and made it so much better. Easily one of my favorite albums of all time, and it holds some of my favorite songs. Casey has come out many times stating that the themes are pretty immature. However, I believe that Act II is so successful because it is extremely relatable. Any immaturity was definitely made-up for in later albums when the character can offer better perspective because he is oldemore experienced. Fun fact: Casey had a cold during the recording of a lot of these songs, and had to strain his voice. Also, during some songs you can hear the creaking of floorboards in his basement (where it was recorded).
The Concept Act II is set in the mid 1910's, and Hunter is in his late teens. Immediately we kick off with Ms. Terri's death (from natural causes) and Hunter burying her. After pondering his existence, the boy sets out for the City to make his own way in the world. On the train (Delphi Express) he meets the Oracles from Act I. The oracles, disguised as bums on the train, warn him not to continue on this track. Like the naive boy he is, he ignores their warning. Hunter enters the city and eventually finds himself outside The Dime, where he sees Ms. Leading, a prostitute (but Hunter doesn't know that she is...because he's naive). Two songs in and they do the dirty. He wakes up the morning after losing his virginity, feeling like a champ, and runs into The Priest/Pimp (P/P). P/P offers Hunter a job, so that he can live in the city. Hunter takes the P/P's proposal because he thinks his one-night stand with a prostitute is true love. So he literally drives Ms. Leading around to her different...clients. Hunter has no idea that Ms. Leading is a prostitute, so he enjoys the job. Until one day...she leaves something in the car and he goes into the house to give it back to her. And low and behold, she's screwing some rando dude. The boy freaks out and lashes out at her. Initially he apologizes, but then runs off and gets drunk. He writes a strongly worded letter and then some more sad letters after that. Deciding he's done with the city, he ships off to enlist with the Allies in WWI.
The Fan Favorite - Red Hands: No matter what, don't shout "RED HANDS" when you're at a concert. Casey HATES this song (probably because he's played it a million times). But there's a reason it's the fan favorite. The raw emotion conveyed in the song is unparalleled. When I do pure Act runs (Act I-IV without stopping) it's the only song I'll listen to twice. The build up and then the vocal cracks at the end...this song isn't perfect but it's so raw and real that it'll leave you dying to hear it live (u/caseycrescenzo pls don't hate me).
My Favorites -

• The Lake and The River: I've said it once and I'll say it again - This song is their magnum opus. If you could take The Dear Hunter and bottle them into one song it would be this nine minute masterpiece.
  
• The Bitter Suite I and II: Meeting Ms. Leading and Through the Dime: The best drumming in all the Acts can be heard in Bitter Suite I. And of course we get "Hey Kid Get a Job" reprise and a burlesque song to close it out.
  
• Smiling Swine: Good luck not singing along to this one. All you need to do is count. To be honest, the real reason this is in my favorites is because the line "Machiavellian Dandelion" is so damn smooth.
  

Act III: Life and Death - June, 2009
And we're off to war. TDH immediately dives into a darker tone, that makes the last album look like a children's cartoon. The production quality is a little high for my taste, but it adds more layers to the album. This album definitely has an A side/B side split (not in quality, but in style).
The Concept In Act III, Hunter is in his 20's. After a little introduction/reminder that the boy's in shit's creek by the Oracles, we're on the battlefield. Men are dying left and right, bombs are going off, people scream at the sky, and the boy starts losing faith in everything. Personally, I think at the end of the first song, he goes a lil crazy (like shellshocked or something) and dreams of a life back in the city with Ms. Leading. We get a little bit of foreshadowing that Hunter will die with "The Moon", while he walks through a battlefield. Next, Hunter's platoon runs into a tank, which decimates everything in it's path. Luckily, Hunter escapes it's destruction, leaving his platoon behind. He runs into a Poison Woman, who basically kills dying men who are suffering. After a chat, she gives him some poison just in case a future plot point needs it (wink wink...deus ex machina). Next he runs into a Thief, named Pierre. The Thief steals from dead men on the battlefield. He gets into an argument with Hunter about the morality of his actions. After this little argument, the boy runs into a battle and has his first encounter with Mustard Gas. He almost dies, but is saved in the last minute by another man who looks exactly like him. After they escape, the two go for drinks and run into a loud, older man who tells this great story about a time he raped a prostitute, because you know that was cool back then. And btw, that prostitute was Ms. Terri aka Hunter's mom, making the singer the boy's Father. To make it more confusing, the Father has another Son: the man who saved Hunter! To clarify, Hunter has a half brother (goes by Son in the fan-base). The Father raped Ms. Terri, who then fled the Dime because she was pregnant with Hunter, and had another Son with another lady. So Hunter is pissed that his dad is a bad person, but his half bro is really chill. Then out of nowhere the Son (brother) dies on the battlefield. The boy is mad that the Father didn't help the Son. The Son's last words to the boy are basically 'you look like me, so pretend to be me...take my identity and kill our dad'. So the boy kills the Father with the poison (told you it would be handy) and heads back to the Son's home. Hence, "Hunter" is dead, because he is pretending to be the Son and will lead a fake life/identity. Yeah stuff got amped up to the max.
The Fan Favorite - What It Means to Be Alone: If you want an intro song to TDH it would be this one. Casey's beautiful singing, the unique instrumentation, and great chord progression makes this song a hit. I always suggest this song to anyone interested in TDH.
My Favorites -

• Mustard Gas: I love when bands just chant a line over and over again. "From the other side" is so strong and the chords/vocals behind it are just simply epic. The ending live is just amazing. Everyone's screaming it and the band's going nuts. Such a powerhouse of a song.
  
• He Said He Had a Story: Want a song that you feel horrible about singing along to? The chant at the end is glorious, but the beginning is incredibly catchy and has such a dark tone that really stands out in the album.
  
• Life and Death: I love the lyrics and the piano work. Also, it's such a satisfying ending to a hectic album.
  

The Color Spectrum - February, 2011
This album is really what sets TDH apart from any other band out there right now. Essentially the 'album' is a collection of EPs. One EP with three or four songs per color in the rainbow (ROYGBIV with Black & White tagged on). Everyone has their favorite color, but just the mere fact that TDH has this range is amazing. You'll see that my favorites are probably more controversial for TCS than any other album, simply because everyone relates to something different. I highly suggest you take 2 hours and listen to it in full via the link provided. Move from black to white and experience the emotion rollercoaster ride in store.
The Concept No story. Enjoy the songs on a thematic level.
The Fan Favorite - Home - White: This song really speaks to everyone. It's a regular at live shows and fun to sing along to.
My Favorites -

• What Time Taught Us - Indigo: I didn't expect to love Indigo, but it's my favorite color. The bands dip into electro beats is just so smooth and integrated. Like I said earlier, I love when bands push chants so this song is an easy favorite. The drums are steady while the electro beat is going nuts. It sounds like someone splashed a bunch of paint on a canvas and is trying to make sense of it. But it works. Also check out Progress/Therma and Mandala too (essentially check out Indigo).
  
• Echo - Orange: The ultimate road trip song. This was the first song I would always play on early morning road trips across the states. It gets me pumped and ready to go on an adventure.
  
• Lillian - Violet: The chorus is so beautiful. This song grew on me a ton. I didn't fully appreciate this song the first time I heard it, but now I can't imagine a better song to fit the color Violet. This is probably the most beautiful song on the album (in my opinion).
  

Migrant - April, 2013
This is the first (and only) non-concept album that TDH released. It's definitely a much more mature sound than the early Acts. This album is often overlooked, but there are some real gems in here. Like Act III there's a definite A side/B side split. I think I'm in the minority in thinking that B side is superior, so don't take my favorites as popular opinion. There are bonus tracks that are really good, but I'll just focus on the main album for this.
The Concept No concept.
The Fan Favorite - Whisper: This song is the new Red Hands, since they close every show with it and it's their most popular song. It's a really fun song! I don't think it's the best technically, or emotionally but it's an uplifting/strong way to end the concert.
My Favorites -

• Shame: Do yourself a favor. Put in earbuds and just walk around your block while listening to this song. The song has this 50's detective vibe that just makes you feel like a bad ass. The second it comes on, I immediately get suspicious of everything around me. It's great!
  
• Let Go: It's a B Side song that I don't see brought up a lot. I just love the chorus and Casey's powerful vocals. The chord progression is strong and the guitar solo is tight. The best part of it is the opening/ending. Those lines are really powerful and well delivered.
  
• Don't Look Back: The perfect closing song. It's a little sad, but the theme is strong and the instrumentation is genius. The piano lines just highlight Casey's haunting vocals. The bridge adds a little bit of a major key that really brightens the song.
  

Act IV: Rebirth in Reprise - September, 2015
And we're back! TDH returns to their roots in a quest to finish the six act concept. They have a full symphonic orchestra backing them up on this album, and it really shows. The orchestration is unparalleled (due to Casey's symphony experience) and the songwriting feels like a breath of fresh air, even though it repeats motifs from earlier Acts. The album feels like a return to the feel of Act II, which I really enjoyed.
The Concept Recap time. Hunter killed his Father, and is taking the Son's (his half-brother's) place, because they look so similar. So, the album starts with Hunter going back to The City. Hunter goes to his half-brother's mom and pretends to be the Son. During the trip he says goodbye to love as a possibility and commits himself to his newfound persona. The mother is simultaneously overwhelmed with happiness to see her son (which is why she blindly accepts him despite the obvious inconsistencies), while also mourning her husband who didn't return (The Father). While staying with The Mother, Hunter remembers Ms. Terri and internally says goodbye to her (even though she's been dead for like two albums). Soon after arriving, Hunter is "kidnapped” by his half brother's friends. They think he is the half-brother and want to surprise him by taking him out for a night on the town. Hunter starts freaking out since he thinks he's really being kidnapped, so the friends stop the charade and reveal that it was just a joke. Later, they wonder why Hunter does not recognize them. Near the end of the night, he sees Ms. Leading, now working as a bartender. He learns that The Dime has been shut down but prostitution is still happening more secretly. Hunter is piss drunk at this point, in a bar called The Squeaky Wheel. He thinks of how good the half-brother was and glorifies him in his head. That's when the half-brother's old fiancee finds Hunter. The fiancee is not surprised to find her lover drunk - which makes Hunter realize that his half-brother wasn't all good. It's implied that the fiancee knows that Hunter isn't her real fiancee but rolls with pretending he is. She thinks it's easier to fake happiness than deal with the loss of her real lover. She makes Hunter get prim and proper because it's time to go to church...and it's the P/P's church. Yeah, he's back and better than ever. After the sermon where he makes everyone give him cash or face damnation, he talks to Hunter. Essentially, P/P convinces Hunter to run for mayor. The boy is totally down, because he wants to fix the problems (mostly the prostitution) with the city. But really he's just being manipulated, cuz he's still an idiot. Using the story of being a war hero and lying about his identity, Hunter is ultimately successful and wins the election. He promises everyone he'll take them to Eden...but that's probably a long shot. After winning, the boy does a lot of self-reflection. Hunter has a conversation with himself and finally goes through with no longer being Hunter and becoming his half-brother. Next, he realizes that his douchiness to Ms. Leading in Act II was way worse than than what Ms. Leading did to him (since it was her career and he was a naive idiot), giving her redemption. Hunter and Ms. Leading look at what they've done in the past, and look at their fear of being judged for their past deeds, and they find a connection. This brings them back together and redeems her in Hunter's view. Finally, he confronts the P/P, ready to shut down the P/P's prostitution ring. The P/P is like 'Yo, I knew who you were this whole time. You're not the person you're pretending to be. I'll expose you if you don't let me run my prostitution ring.' Hunter gets angry, but he's in a pickle. He either has to sacrifice everything he's built up or face being manipulated for his entire career. Then the boy's like 'I'm an idiot. I should have listened to the oracles who literally told me not to do everything I did. Boy I miss home" And then the album ends...
The Fan Favorite - A Night on the Town: This song is very reminiscent of The Lake and the River in that it encapsulates everything that The Dear Hunter represents. There are so many motifs and sections to this song that make it a fan favorite and crowd pleaser at every concert.
My Favorites -

• The Bitter Suite VI: Abandon: Hands down the most beautiful song TDH has done yet. This one flies under the radar, but is such a good song. The classical guitar adds such beautiful instrumentation. Casey pulled a crime by only giving us the chorus once. Seriously, Casey why?????
  
• If All Goes Well: This gets the award for song I most want to see live. The beginning with choppy guitar chords just feels awesome. The chorus is strong and catchy. But the end is what really makes this song beautiful. The chords behind the vocals are gorgeous. I think it's so beautiful and powerful at the same time. Definitely an underrated song.
  
• At The End of the Earth: The chord progression! The chord progression! The chord progression is SO good. When the intro fades and you get the acoustic guitar with the bass just in your face it gives me goosebumps. Casey's relaxed vocals go so far in making this one of the best songs on the album.
  

Act V: Hymns with the Devil in Confessional - September, 2016
One year later, Casey surprised everyone by announcing Act V was written and recorded at the same time as Act IV. I naturally assumed the two albums would sound similar - but I was pleasantly surprised in how different they are. Act V is much darker and plays like a negative picture of Act IV. Also, with the announcement of Act V we learned that Act VI will act more as an epilogue and will not be in the form of a rock album. For this reason, Act V acts as a conclusion for the story that really started in Act I and fulfills the prophecy in the first track of Act I. This is my favorite TDH album for so many reasons. It's beautiful, intricate, sad and holds the climax of the story.
The Concept It is now the 1930's and Hunter is a true adult. Some time has passed between the start of Act V and where Act IV left off. Hunter is still the mayor and operating under the P/P's thumb (which he's sad about). However, some things have changed. Hunter and Ms. Leading are back together. Hunter is leading a double life with her in secret. Hunter and the Fiancée are married in Act V (she is now The Wife). The Wife knows about Ms. Leading. but looks the other way. In Act V, Hunter is a fractured mess of a person - he is addicted to opium and feels like he's living a dual life between Ms. Leading (who he loves) and the Wife. The album starts with the boy going to an opium den and having an out of body experience and being able to basically see his former self talk and swear to do right by him. Which is super trippy, but makes good music. Afterwards, Hunter makes his way to the church where he passes out, after realizing that he can't keep living this fake life. He wakes up to another sermon by the P/P. The P/P delivers a parable about a gambler who challenged the devil to a game of poker. On the surface, it's an anti gambling sermon to the congregation. But it's being delivered in such a way that, to Hunter, it is clearly about Act IV. He tried to beat the devil, but really he ended up setting the devil free. Hunter reflects and wonders if he is the Devil or the gambler. After the sermon, the P/P has a huge revival of his prostitution ring. It's back and worse than ever. The men are more brutal to the prostitutes and the P/P is getting away with it because he has Hunter under his thumb. In disgust, Hunter goes to see Ms. Leading, and realizes that she is the only thing that keeps him happy and that he truly loves her in every sense of the word. After this little love song, we hear footsteps...Mr. Usher is coming to town. Yep - a new game-changing character is introduced super late in the story and he's here to usher in the end. Mr. Usher is an old politician. He's sort of a relic, but very capable of terror. But he has no interest in doing it himself. He loves the act of turning people against each other and that's exactly what he does to P/P and Hunter. Before the chaos he will eventually cause, Mr. Usher takes a walk with Hunter and tries to convince him that the people of the City are not worth saving. But Hunter sees the potential for goodness in people. Also, he wonders how Mr. Usher became such a charlatan and what must have gone wrong in his life for him to turn evil (which is a nice bit of character development). Realizing that he can't keep living this lie and that he needs to do something about the P/P, Hunter sends his son and wife to the Lake & River, so they're not in harms way and because he doesn't think he's fit to be a father (wink, wink, it's a cycle). Then he has another opium hallucination and realizes its time to change his situation. Meanwhile, Mr. Usher tells P/P that he's losing control of Hunter, which is true. Mr. Usher is trying to convince him to kill Ms. Leading but make it look like an accident, so that the Boy will be broken and empty, making him an easier person to manipulate. Mr Usher knows this won’t work but simply wants to bring an end to it all. The P/P kills Ms. Leading and it's super sad. Then we get the climax of the story. Hunter finds Ms. Leading dead and just snaps. The half brother persona is gone and the old Hunter is back. He sets fire to The Dime, which then spreads to the Church. The P/P calls all the townspeople and sets out on a witch-hunt to kill Hunter for burning down his house of god. He tells the citizens of the City that Hunter is not who he's been pretending to be and that Hunter had manipulated the P/P (which is the exact opposite of what happened). The P/P goes into Hunter's home to confront him, and Hunter stabs the P/P with the knife he had when he was a child. He stands over TP/P’s body in his house and contemplates what is left for him - nothing. If he dies, this pain will stop, it will all be over, at least things won’t suck anymore. OR, and this is the turning point in A Beginning, what if there is some sort of afterlife and everyone you’ve loved is there and it’s great? He commits suicide and the album ends with the reprise of the Lake South & River North theme. There's something very special about the last few minutes of "A Beginning," with the huge swell and then the reprise, but Casey hasn't told us why, that's going to be a big part of Act VI...
The Fan Favorite - Gloria: It was difficult to choose a fan favorite since the album's only been out for a few months. However, Gloria makes a great single and is very accessible. The guitar riff is just so original and classy. Also, the music video gives the best depiction of the Acts in movie form. If you're a fan and you haven't seen this music video you should watch it right now.
My Favorites - (FYI I don't have good links for these songs, but you should own the album or check out the tracks on Spotify)

• The Fire (Remains): This is my favorite song The Dear Hunter has ever made. It is the climax and is what five albums have been leading up to. I can't say anything more without ruining the impact of the song. You NEED to listen to this song and draw your own conclusions yourself.
  
• The March: This song is the ultimate fan service. Starting with a reprise of Smiling Swine and ending with a reprise of The Old Haunt - it hits all the right buttons. The chorus of townspeople in the background gives this song a theatrical feel. Also the intensity of the line "house of god is reduced to ash" is unreal.
  
• The Moon/Awake: I like to describe this track as escalating. Every minute this song gets better. The bridge is one of the most beautiful things the band has ever done. The keys are just going crazy and Nick's tearing up the set and Casey's voice is so full of passion and the lyrics are gorgeous. This song is just perfectly crafted.
  

And there it is. Hope you all enjoyed it. If you have any more questions feel free to ask. The sub is awesome and it's a great community to join. I truly think TDH is one of the most talented, under appreciated bands out there. So, spread the word to your friends, share this post with any newcomer and let's get more people familiar with this amazing band!
FUN STUFF: Check out this video made by u/tunas_have_nostrils_ It shows how Casey & crew utilize similar motifs across the Acts. He spent a ton of time on it and it's pretty great.
Check out this video if you want to have a good song ruined forever...